“You’re going to talk about us?” His jaw went slack and his face molten with disbelief.

“Of course I’m going to talk about us. Well, mostly you. You’re the one everyone wants to know about. The sweetest, most wholesome deviant America ever produced. You would be surprised by just how many of your past partners are willing to come out of the woodwork. There’s even interest in a reality series, all of us living in one place in a big city, trying to find a suitable replacement. A re-Chase-ment, if you will.”

She had to be kidding him, it was so preposterous. He could feel a headache starting above his left eye. “Very funny, Amanda, enough with the jokes. You and I both know you aren’t going to do any of those things. You melted down with a minute of exposure, now you’re suddenly willing to live under a microscope? I don’t think so.”

“You underestimate your own ability. It was you that convinced me I was allowed to have it all. Not to be afraid to play the hand I was dealt and make the most of it. And I don’t know, something about being part of a sisterhood makes me feel bolder. It won’t be so bad, after all, it’s not like any of us are actually mad at you. Some of those actresses tell a pretty compelling tale. There may be a few who are flat-out lying, but I’ll be damned if I can tell the difference. I’ll let you figure it out with them in court.”

Chase’s temple throbbed again. “You’re bluffing.”

Amanda shrugged dismissively. “Maybe. But now you need to figure out just how far I’m willing to go to stay in. The interview went to the highest bidder and the check for it is already in my possession. They gave me the mortgage based on the letter of intent from the publishing company and my father’s signature. He thinks you’re acting like an ass, too, by the way. Your willingness to sell for such a reasonable price only made it easier all the way around. I should probably be thanking you.”

“You know who you should be thanking? The fifteen lawyers standing on the other side of the door; they’re the only thing preventing me from dragging you across this table.”

He was already making threats, a wonderful sign. He wasn’t aloof and patronizing anymore, but he was far from losing his cool. Amanda stood and leaned both elbows on the table, essentially bending over it, and said seductively, “Want me to meet you halfway? I promise to keep it quiet.”

It was so over-the-top, designed to goad him. She knew exactly what she was doing. It was absolutely working. Chase remained in his chair, his elbow on the armrest, propping the side of his head up with one finger. He was glaring intensely, his eyes practically glowing. “Trust me, the way I’m feeling right now, if I got my hands on you, they’d hear. I’ll tie you up in court for all eternity to keep any of it from happening; you do know that, right?”

Amanda looked at him with such feigned innocence, still fully bent over the table, he had to keep himself from leaping out of his chair and pouncing on her. “Tie me up? If we were still together, I’d be giving that some thought. But instead I’ll think about how a long-drawn-out court battle would keep it in the headlines for a good long time. I can see where that sort of publicity might be helpful to me, but I’m not really seeing the benefit in it for you.”

She had him. This little girl had fucked him up good. He could almost hear the sound of his endorsement deals drying up, something he could live with, but eventually his game would suffer. If she was going to expose them anyway, better to take the hit quickly. One more round of damage control. The house meant nothing to him. He certainly didn’t want it, why didn’t he just let her have it? Because it’d be bought with proceeds earned at his expense. Oh, I’d like to let her have it, he thought. His heart pounded painfully in his ears. He had her all wrong. He had dreamt about her, agonizing dreams full of want and longing. Because deep down Chase still thought she was made for him, the only woman he’d ever love. Someone he could trust, even if she hadn’t exactly stood by him. Not someone who would go out of her way to try to destroy him. He studied her from across the table where she had retaken her seat, politely waiting for him to respond. He had hoped by now she’d be nothing more than a faceless distraction, the one dull, aching scar in his otherwise charmed life. Seeing her brought back all the memories, even the ones he’d tried to forget. And worse than that, he knew that in the end he would give her what she wanted, for no other reason than she wanted it. That even as it killed him, now that he saw her, he knew he wouldn’t be able to deny her. The one time he sent her away was all he had in him. After the initial feeling of betrayal had worn off, he had waited for weeks in hopeful anticipation that she would contact him again. But not like this, not to drive the final nails in his coffin. Damn, she still had the ability to take his breath away, her round blue eyes and bow-shaped mouth as captivating as the ones tucked away within his memory. Her fitted Donna Karan dress created perfect recall of her every curve. There was just one difference; she was safe in his memory. He could protect her there, better than he did before. Not feed her to the media machine, to be spit out into the kind of woman who was now sitting across from him.

“Why do you even want the house, Amanda?” he finally asked, teetering off furious and closer to resolved defeat.

“Because it’s mine. You were building it for me. It’s mine and I want it.”

The words were bratty enough on their own merit, before she added the tone. She didn’t stamp her foot, but she did sit straight up and cross her legs. Was she still deliberately trying to tweak him? There was something far more natural about it. Chase quirked an eyebrow. “So you get it. You honor your commitments and make us both look like a couple of idiots, then what?”

Amanda’s mouth formed a tight line, a look she perfected for him. “I’m going to burn it to the ground.”

Chase blinked, startled by her response. “That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard.”

She leaned back in her chair, crossed her arms, and dared to smirk. “Would you rather I keep it? Settle down? Raise a family?”

The thought of her carrying another man’s child slammed into the side of his head like a sledgehammer. His look hardened again. A look so hard that came on so fast, Amanda was afraid that she may have pushed him too far. She couldn’t help from reacting and she jolted when he suddenly stood up. He walked away from the conference table and over to the wide picture window on the other side of the room. It was getting too difficult to maintain a semblance of control with her so close. His hands clasped tightly behind his back, he stared out the window, a panoramic view of a parking lot. His one hand clenched and unclenched into a fist, his other hand holding it in place behind his broad back. Several long moments passed.

“Why are you doing this to me?” Chase asked, so befuddled and sad, Amanda thought he might begin to cry and wondered how she was going to get through the next few minutes without starting to as well. But it was her turn to be strong for both of them, and it was now or never.

“Because you’re stubborn as a mule,” she replied. “And I had to be sure.”

Even through his suit jacket she could see his shoulder blades begin to come together as his back stiffened and his fist clenched again.

“Sure of what?” he asked wearily, in direct contrast with the tight fist being restrained by his other hand.

“That you weren’t really over me,” she told him.

“I’ll never be over you,” Chase said quietly, still staring out the window. “Happy now?”

“Almost.”

“Get everyone back in here. Let’s close this deal. You can have the house.”

“I don’t want the house, Chase. I think you know that.”

“I don’t know anything anymore,” he blurted despondently to the window, dropping both hands to his sides and his head in surrender. Shaggy blond hair, much in need of a trim, fell partially onto his forehead. He ran his hand absently through it and heaved a heavy sigh. “What more do you want from me?”

Amanda got out of her chair and walked to the corner of the conference table near where he was standing, his back still to her. She pulled herself up and sat on it. Her legs swayed slightly as they dangled.

“There is a way out of this for both of us, you know,” she stated simply.

“Is there?” he asked, snorting in disgust, hating that he already sensed she had gotten closer even before she spoke. “Obviously, I’ve missed something.”

Amanda shook her head slowly. The solution was right in front of him and he honestly couldn’t see it. Had she set him so far off-kilter his instincts no longer kicked in?

“Why do you insist on torturing yourself?” she asked randomly.

“It’s better than torturing you, isn’t it?” he bit back.

Silence hung thick in the air. She could almost see the aura of pain that surrounded him. It dulled all his charismatic light. He wasn’t talking about torturing her physically. He really believed she’d orchestrated what was happening in retaliation and the attempt to further tarnish his reputation. It was heartbreaking to see him so lost, knowing she was party to it. She was never so grateful to have him presenting his back to her. To see that despair reflected in his eyes at that moment would’ve killed her. She just needed a few minutes more. If she could stay strong and resolute, not crumble and force him to save her, she’d conquer the last of the barriers that stood in her way and finally enter nirvana. Getting there would mean nothing if he wasn’t with her.

“When I first took off, I wasn’t sure if you would try to find me. Afraid I wouldn’t have the time to think things through,” she said quietly.

“I could’ve found you,” he mused to the window. “I have the resources.”

“Don’t you think I know that, Chase? I’ve known all along you didn’t come after me because you knew it was what I wanted. I never expected it to take as long as it did to figure it all out.”

“But you don’t understand, and I keep telling you, Amanda, as soon as you left you were gone. I told you, only once. I didn’t come find you because that was the rule.”

“Come on, Chase, you know this doesn’t have anything to do with any rule. But for the sake of argument, your rule was based on something that didn’t fall within the confines of our agreement. The rule was I couldn’t leave when you made me uncomfortable. You never set down the rules for when Entertainment Tonight, ESPN, and Fox News took a stab at it.”

“A technicality.” He sighed sadly. “You knew all those things came with the package.”

“Not when it came to our secret,” she said emphatically. “And you’re right; it wasn’t fair for me to leave you worrying about where I was while you were in the middle of trying to handle the crisis. But you knew I was safe, because my father told you I was. It was convenient to blame Alan Shaw, but I really did what I thought was best for both of us. I wasn’t going to be any help to you, Chase. I was freaking out. I needed to go someplace to just be mad at you for a while. The kind of mad that didn’t want to concern itself with repercussions of any kind. Not only did I not want to worry about setting you off when I went on obscenity-laced diatribes, I didn’t want to worry about feeling guilty watching you punish yourself as you scrambled around trying to make me not be mad anymore. And I had to take the time to really forgive myself. I knew what I was doing that night; I was just as thrilled by the thought of getting caught as you were, until it actually happened. I failed you, too; I didn’t take very good care of your secret. I had no idea you would consider my listening to Alan a total breach of trust. I should’ve. But I assure you, the choice to leave was all mine. My father tried to tell me to stay, too. And I knew running away would never be a decision you would make or let me make. I made my own decision. I probably made the wrong one, but I’m new to the people-knowing-my-name thing. I made a mistake and I’m sorry. Don’t you think we’ve punished each other, and ourselves, long enough?”

Chase turned back around to face her, but instead of the pain she heard in his voice, something a tad different had settled in as well. The tiny yet distinct flicker of the man she knew. Amanda didn’t miss it. It drew her in and began warming her, a kind of warmth that only he knew how to create, one of the many things she wanted and needed. It was the spark of everything she ever wanted, every dream she ever could have. It was a beacon just calling to be blown on. It would burst into flame and incinerate the entire room. She knew she had the wind power.