Kristen Ashley - The Will

“I…” I began again but stopped again.

One of his arms left me, his hand came to my chin and he tipped my head back.

His eyes caught mine in the moonlight. “Babe, I was pissed at you but lookin’ back at it, not pissed and havin’ seen that look now more than once, you walked into that room lookin’ turned way the fuck on.”

Oh dear.

“I was,” I whispered.

“So you came in there to get yourself some.”

Did I?

Oh God.

I did.

“I—” I started again but stopped this time because his body was shaking and in doing so, it was shaking me and the bed.

This was because he was laughing.

“Jake?” I called. “Are you laughing?”

“Oh yeah,” he rumbled, his voice filled with humor and even though I heard him, he confirmed, “Fuck yeah.”

“I’m uncertain what’s amusing.”

His arm went back around me and he used both to slide me up his chest so we were eye to eye.

He still had a smile in his voice when he asked, “You think that instead of you comin’ outta your skin tonight, maybe it wasn’t that and instead you dropped the disguise?”

“What disguise?”

There was no smile in his voice at all when he said gently, “The one you been wearin’ for a long fuckin’ time, baby.”

Yes, Gran had talked about me.

I said nothing but I did something.

I slid down the bed and hid, doing this by pressing my face back into his chest.

“How ‘bout we talk about that later,” he suggested, still speaking gently.

I again said nothing but I indicated agreement by nodding.

He gathered me close in his arms again and stated, “Glad you get off on me fightin’.”

I took in a deep breath and gratefully accepted his subject change. “I met a woman prior to your bout. Her name is Alyssa and she warned me that would happen.”

“Alyssa. Surprised I didn’t hear her moanin’ through the walls before I came out for my fight. More times than I could count over the years, before the door closes on her ass, me and a bunch of boys have seen her drop to her knees and start to blow Junior just freein’ his dick from his trunks enough for her to latch on.”

It would seem that fighters and their partners were very blunt when discussing sex.

However, that wasn’t what concerned me.

What concerned me was that I might have become the new Alyssa of the adult boxing league that night.

Therefore, I mumbled, “At least you locked the door.”

There was a moment of silence before he called, “Babe.”

I didn’t reply. I quite enjoyed Jake fighting and although I would never have guessed it, I much wanted to see him do it again.

Alas, I couldn’t. I couldn’t show my face again.

It would be mortifying.

“Josie,” he called again.

“I’m tired,” I told him which wasn’t completely a lie.

“Baby, look at me.”

I took in another deep breath before I tipped my head back and looked at him.

He was already looking at me and he didn’t delay in speaking when he caught my eyes.

“I get that was probably not your thing but outside of that assclown bein’ an assclown and mouthin’ off, I’ll tell you how that felt for me. You’re beautiful. You’re classy. You’re sweet. You dress fuckin’ cool and unbelievably hot. I KO’d the third seed in our league in five minutes and I was prouder of walkin’ out of that room with you, knowin’ everyone knew you were mine and just how you were mine, what I could do to you and what you could give to me, than I was at watching him hit the mat.”

“That’s absurd and beautiful, both at the same time,” I blurted.

I saw his white teeth in the shadows and knew he was smiling when he advised, “Grasp on to the beautiful part, Slick.”

“I’ll make an effort to do that, Jake.”

I watched his face get closer then I felt his mouth on mine. He kissed me, it was again deep and sweet but it wasn’t long before he broke contact with my mouth and lifted his lips to touch them to my forehead.

He then dropped to his back but took me with him, holding me close to his side.

I wrapped my arm around his flat stomach and rested my cheek against his chest.

“You get on with Alyssa?” he asked when we’d settled.

“She was lovely, albeit loud and foul-mouthed.”

“She’s the shit. Good woman. Good mom. Good to Junior.”

“She asked me for my number,” I shared and his arm around my back gave me a squeeze.

“I’ll talk to Junior. Get hers. She doesn’t call you, you call her. You got me, the kids, but women need women at their backs and she’d be a good one.”

I didn’t have very many women at mine, but the ones I had, I knew this was true.

“I’ll call her if she doesn’t call me.”

That got me another squeeze before he murmured, “Good.”

He fell silent.

I stared at the shadowed angles of his chest.

I did this for some time before I whispered, “Jake?”

“Baby, we’re good,” he whispered back, answering the question I hadn’t yet asked. The question that had me most afraid. The question that might lead to what we’d done being a foolhardy act which would mean we’d lose all we’d built. And even in the short time we’d had, we’d built something beautiful I never wanted to lose.

I just wanted to build it higher, stronger and keep it forever.

“What’s next?” I queried.

“Don’t know, Josie. Just know whatever it is I want you to be a part of it and I hope like fuck you want the same.”

I closed my eyes tight and pressed my cheek hard to his chest.

I wanted the same.

I very much wanted the same.

But I didn’t expect Jake to want it.

Clearly, he did.

And I didn’t know how to feel the feeling I was feeling. I’d been content for so long I forgot how to feel happy.

I turned my head and my lips moved against his skin when I noted, “You like me too.”

His hand slid up my spine to curl around the back of my neck when he replied, “Oh yeah, honey. I like you too.”

I swallowed the emotion that was clogging my throat and dipped my chin into my neck so I could press my forehead into his skin.

His hand tightened on my neck and he urged, “Go to sleep, Josie.”

At his command, I opened my eyes, turned my head and settled in. “Okay, Jake.”

He moved his other arm to wrap both around me and I settled deeper into him. With effort, I relaxed against him and it didn’t take long before one of his arms slid away, the other one loosened, his hand resting lightly at my waist, and I knew he was asleep.

I wasn’t asleep.

The last time I got what I wanted, what I really, really wanted was when Andy came to sit by me in lunch at high school.

And that didn’t work out very well.

Somehow, it had happened again.

I’d been happy then.

I felt happy now.

Right alongside utterly terrified.

This thought seized me and I rolled away from Jake to turn my eyes to the window.

I couldn’t see the sea from where I was in the bed, but I could see the inky sky and bright shaft of moonlight.

I was barely away from him but for seconds before Jake rolled into me and I felt his arm curl around my belly.

He did nothing more. He said nothing. His breath was even. His hold was again loose.

“Jake?” I whispered.

He didn’t reply.

He’d rolled into me in his sleep.

I stared at the view and seeing that view, lying in that bed, Jake holding me in his sleep, it came to me that Gran gave this to me.

Gran gave it to me.

All of it.

She knew what she was doing from the very beginning.

So it was safe.

And it was mine.

On that thought, I felt the tension slide out of my shoulders and away from spine, my lips curved up, my body pressed back into the warm hardness of Jake’s and my eyelids dropped.

Thus on that thought, I fell asleep for the first time in over two decades doing it carefree.

And doing it happy.

Jake opened his eyes and saw white ceiling and white cornices.

But he felt Josie’s hair all over his chest and shoulder, her cheek on his pec, her arm around his gut, the warmth of her soft body pressed to his side and the silk of her short nightie on his arm but his hand that was resting on her hip felt nothing but skin.

This was why he smiled.

His eyes caught on the pink of the walls and his mind brought up an image of that room which was almost all flowers, the armchair by the window, the cover on the bed, the toss pillows that were everywhere. The prints didn’t match but it worked in a girlie way that was definitely not him, it wasn’t even Josie, but it was Lydie. There were even faded pictures of flowers in frames on the walls.

With all that pink and all those flowers, it was a wonder his testosterone levels didn’t take a nosedive the instant he entered the room.

Then again, he could get it up for Josie anytime, anyplace. He knew that because he had to fight against getting hard at a fucking high school football game with just her pressed to his side.

He could definitely do it in a room filled with flowers.

He’d proved that last night.

And now.

He wanted her. He was ready for her. His mind was no longer on flowers but on the red silk nightie she was wearing.

His favorite color was blue but that red nightie was the absolute shit. Josie in it, her long hair down and even wet, her in that nightie was the hottest thing he’d ever seen.

But he’d only had one condom in his wallet. He’d taken her without one in the locker room but until they had the conversation, that was all he was going to take.

Which sucked.

This meant he couldn’t have her again and with the day ahead, he wouldn’t be able to have her until that night.

So they had to have the conversation.

They just wouldn’t be having it now.

Last night, they’d taken a giant leap forward, a fucking awesome one. Even with that, he wasn’t going to start pushing her now.

To calm his shit down, he was trying not to think of her in that sexy as fuck dress she wore last night, sitting ringside for him, following him to the locker room, that look on her face, that heat in her pretty blue eyes, when she moved her head slightly on his chest.

He knew by the way it felt she wasn’t moving in her sleep but instead moving in a way she was trying not to wake him so he knew she was awake.

Therefore he tightened his arm around her and rolled them so he was resting partly on her front, partly down her side. He hitched a knee to spread her legs and rested it almost at the heat of her as he lifted his head and looked down at her face.

Fuck.

So fucking pretty.

Jake slid his hand up her side, over her chest, up her neck and gently spread her hair out, arranging it on the pillow, his eyes watching, and when he got what he wanted, he caught her gaze and whispered, “Mornin’, Slick.”

Her lips tipped up and she whispered back, “Good morning, Jake.”

At the sound of her voice, the feel of her under him, it hit him.

Christ, she was there. Under him. In a nightie. Her hair spread on the pillow. Her hands resting light on his lower back. He’d tasted her sweet pussy. He’d fucked it twice. He’d watched her come in the shower, giving it to her with his fingers. He’d swallowed her whimpers and moans. He’d felt her tighten around him every-fucking-where.

Ethan’s mom, Sloane had been the best he’d ever had.

Until Josie.

He’d never, not once, not even knowing how good Sloane could give it to him, lost his control like he had in the locker room last night.

And she’d delivered, along for the ride, clutching tight, pressing close, giving in and taking it.

In her bed later wasn’t better, but it was slower, sweeter and he liked the way she took him after he gave it to her.

Clutching tight.

Pressing close.

Holding on.

On this thought, he dipped his head and ran the side of his nose along hers. He felt her body soften further beneath him when he did and he knew in feeling it that he needed to get her ass out of bed, feed her, get her in clothes and get her to his house. If he didn’t, they’d be having the conversation he didn’t want to have yet.

She seemed good but he knew he had to slow shit down. Go gentle. Give her steady. This was a massive shift for her, seeing as she’d missed him going gently but taking them where they were now.