Rachel Dyken - Toxic

“Does it bother you?” She handed me the apron. I pulled it over my head and paused.

“Being shirtless? No.”

Saylor sighed and leaned against the counter top. “Not that. I still call you Gabe.”

I thought about it for a minute and answered. “Say, you met me as Gabe. All you know is Gabe. To you, I’m Gabe… so what if to the rest of the world I’m still Ashton? We’re the same person, and both Gabe and Ashton are in love with you.”

“That sounds like you have multiple personalities.” She teased, tugging the un-tied apron strings back so that I was plastered against her.

“I gotta admit, I kind like the idea that you’ll have a variety of names to choose from when I make you scream.”

Saylor’s face flamed red.

“Don’t worry.” I kissed her mouth. “We eat first.”

“And then?” Her voice wavered.

“And then…” I shrugged. “Forever. We have until forever.”

Healing doesn’t come right away — and even though I was still in pain, this time I embraced it, because the pain was a reminder that she had existed. The pain reminded me — she’d lived. Funny, how I used to think numbing my pain would make it go away. But the only way to fully rid yourself of the pain is to go against nature and embrace it. —Gabe H.

Gabe

My eyes roamed greedily over her lips. I couldn’t manage to pull my gaze away from her mouth as she took a sip of water and leaned back in her chair.

“Finished?” I stood and walked over to her side of the table.

“Yeah.” Saylor sighed. “No more fish.”

“So…” I held out my hand and pulled her to her feet then wrapped my arms around her. “About that last tear.”

Her eyebrows knit together in confusion. “I thought that the whole fish throwing thing and naked cooking got rid of that last tear. Besides, enough tears have been shed on both ends, Gabe.”

“True.” I pressed a kiss to her mouth and smiled against her lips. “But I want to be really sure.”

“Really sure?”

“Yup.” I laughed. “I don’t want to leave any room for doubt.”

“Doubt about what?”

“The way I feel about you. The way I feel about us. The way I feel about everything.” I sighed and released my hold on her hands, taking a step back so I could gather my thoughts better. “Today was Princess’s funeral. But Kimmy? She’s been gone for four years.” I shrugged. “Honestly, I thought I’d feel broken forever.”

Saylor didn’t move a muscle.

“But…” I paced in front of her. “I don’t. For some reason, in her death, I finally feel whole. Like everything’s come full circle. But there’s still something missing.”

“More fish?” Saylor offered.

“You’re getting warm.” I smirked and purposefully strode toward her.

“Water?”

“Even warmer.” I grinned, tilting her chin toward my face.

“More… boats?”

“With sails…” I sighed. “And people who man them…”

“You lost me.”

“Saylor.” I kissed her mouth. “I’m missing you. You’re the final piece to the puzzle, the star on the top of the Christmas tree.”

“I have always wanted to be a star.” She grinned.

“Be serious.”

“Call me a star again.”

“Say…” I groaned her name. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” Saylor’s arms snaked around my neck as she pressed her lips against mine, once, twice, three times. And then pulled back.

“I know you’re young…” Damn, my throat was dry. Stupid nerves. “But, I want to start a life with you — I want to be with you. Forever.”

Saylor’s face lit up. “What exactly are you asking?”

“You’re going to make me say it, aren’t you?”

She nodded.

I fell down on one knee.

And that’s when she started sobbing.

“I swear the harder I try to fix your tears, the more you cry. I’m going to be a nervous wreck around you for the rest of my life.”

She nodded again, wiping the tears from her eyes.

“Saylor.” I cleared my throat “I know you’re young. I know you need to finish school. I’m great with that, because I’m not going anywhere. I want to build my life here, with you. I want to have a beginning, a middle, and an end to our story. I want to create music with you. I want to take care of you. The last thing in this world that I deserve, is the gift of your love, the gift of your commitment to me. I realize that…” I shrugged, using the shrug as a way to actually process this huge moment.

Funny, my whole life had been based around Princess, but now that I had the freedom to have a future. All I saw was Saylor. Living wasn’t living without sharing that life with her.

“But I want you anyways, by my side. I want you to marry me.” My hands shook as I grabbed hers and squeezed. “Damn, I think I’m doing this wrong.” Nervous, I briefly broke eye contact and then looked up at her perfect face. “I love you. I love you more than life itself. I never want to say goodbye. And I don’t want to pretend ever again. Please, be my wife?” Please say yes, please say yes. Please don’t kick my ass…

Saylor nodded and then jerked me to my feet. Our mouths met when I was about halfway off the ground.

“I’m excited,” Saylor sobbed, “to start our story.”

“Sweetheart…” I kissed her soft mouth. “Our story started the first time I laid eyes on you and you fell on your ass.”

“Thanks for the reminder.”

“Stalker.”

“Turtle.”

“Maybe we’ll come up with better nicknames.” I kissed her harder across the mouth and pulled back.

“Later.” Saylor’s tongue pushed past my lips.

Groaning I lifted her into the air and assaulted her mouth, “Right. later.”

Gabe

6 months later

“Wife!” My yell echoed around the house. A smile formed on my lips when Saylor walked around the corner with her hands on her hips and glared.

“When I said new nicknames I meant something sexy.”

“Sorry.” I shrugged helplessly. “Wife…” I said it in a deep sultry voice and then started peeling off my clothes. First my shirt, second my jeans, third my boxers.

Saylor’s breath hissed out of her mouth as I stood in front of her naked. “You were saying? Wife?”

Saylor focused in on my abs, legs, arms — really every part of my body but my face.

I snapped my fingers. “Hey, up here. We’re about to have a serious talk.”

“Like that?” She pointed at me and squeaked.

“Yup.” I crossed my arms.

“Fine.” She pulled off her shirt.

“Wait.” I held up my hands. “What are you doing?”

“Two can play this game.” Her hands moved to her jeans.

We’d been married two days. Two actual days.

Rather than waiting, Saylor and I decided that, doing the whole long engagement thing? Not working so well, especially considering it felt like we were practically living together anyway.

Besides, if there was one thing we learned it was that we weren’t promised tomorrow, only today, so we got married.

“Say…” I groaned once her jeans fell to the floor.

She stepped out of them, clad in only her bra and underwear and then moved her hands.

“Wait!” I shouted my eyes fighting to figure out where to look first. “Our very serious discussion can’t happen if we’re both naked.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah.” I moved toward her, slowly, “It’s against the rules.”

“And who put you in charge of the rules?”

“Sweetheart, I’m Ashton freaking Hyde.”

“Ah,” Saylor nodded, a knowing gleam flaring in her eyes. “Pulling the celebrity jackass card… classy.”

I tilted my head to the side and lifted my hands helplessly into the air. “If the shoe fits.”

“The shoe’s about to find its way to Gabe Jr. and we all know how fond you are of every part being in working order.”

Snorting, I rolled my eyes, “Please, I didn’t hear you complaining last night, or this morning.”

“Whore.”

“I’m your whore.” I pointed out. “So it’s totally legal.”

“What’s this discussion about?” She crossed her arms making her breasts pop up in her bra, distracting me considerably from my goal of winning the battle I’d started.

“Up here.” Saylor snapped her fingers in front of me. “You have three seconds.”

“Dishwasher.” I pulled her against me. Damn, her skin felt good. “You forgot to load it.”

“False.” She breathed, arching her body into mine. “That was your chore for the week, check the chart.”

“I made the chart.”

“Aw, Ashton freaking Hyde, are you pouting?”

“No.” Yes.

“The chart,” Saylor pointed out, “was only established for what reason?”

I glared.

“Sorry, I didn’t catch that.” Saylor cupped her ear.

Grumbling, I looked down and answered, “Because I have a bad habit of baking too many cookies, feeding them to you, and then not cleaning up my mess.”

“Right.” Saylor nodded. “So technically this discussion is a moot point.”

“Not really.” I smirked, reaching behind her back and snapping her bra off. “Pretty sure I just made it a real discussion again.”

“Oh yeah?” She put her hands on her hips, letting me openly gape. “How do you figure?”

“Now we can discuss how beautiful you are.” I kissed her hard on the mouth and retreated. “How damn sexy I find you.” I sucked her lower lip. “And how excited I am that one day I’ll have little princesses running around that look exactly like you.”

“Charmer.” Saylor breathed as my hands reached for the last shred of clothing that was separating our bodies from one another.

Laughing, I picked her up into my arms and carried her to the couch, careful to kiss her lips, plunder the depths of her mouth, and tease until she was ready to either scream at me or hit me.

I tossed her onto the couch.

“Gabe…!”

“Love you.” I hovered over her, kissing every inch of skin, savoring the feel of her warmth against my mouth.

“I need you,” she moaned.

My body was already on fire — being with her did that to me, made me want to seriously spend my days having sex and never doing anything else with my life. Ever. But when I brought up that topic to Saylor, she said the only people who made careers out of sex were prostitutes.

I, of course, pointed out that since we were married it didn’t matter.

She said if money changed hands, it did.

With a grin I kissed her neck and finally entered her with excruciating slowness. I would never tire of that feeling — of being one with the person I loved.

Saylor whimpered as I brought her body to the brink of release, only to slow down again.

Teasing her, even in intimate moments was my favorite thing in the world.

“Gabe!” Saylor yelled.

I chuckled. “Louder?”

“I—”

My mouth crushed hers as her body tensed and then went limp against mine.

Careful not to squash her, I managed to lie next to her.

“Tell me…” she whispered. “One true thing.”

“I love you.” I kissed her cheek. “And a lifetime of days like this? Won’t ever be enough.”

“I like that truth.”

“Yeah.” I wrapped my arm around her. “I do too. What about you? What’s your truth for the day?”

Saylor shifted toward me. “Someday, when we do have kids… and we bring a little princess into the world, I think we should name her Kimmy.”

I couldn’t find my voice. I could only nod as I felt my eyes well with tears. “I think— I think she would have liked that.”

“Yeah.” Saylor sighed. “Me too.”

The doorbell rang.

Panicked, I jolted up and nearly knocked Saylor off the couch.

“Who is it?” Saylor called in a totally calm voice while I was busy trying to locate articles of clothing. Why was I only finding my socks? How were socks going to cover this up?

I mean, seriously.

“Hurry up, guys, it’s freezing!” Lisa shouted.

“Shit!” I found my pants, only to fall on my ass, because my feet slid on my shirt. I looked at Saylor as the light bulb clicked on in her brain too.

“Taco Tuesday!” We shouted at the same time.

“Guys! Come on!” Lisa pounded the door again.

“Keep your pants on!” I yelled back.

Saylor sighed and quickly buttoned her jeans.

I wasn’t as fast.

I was like a turtle. Ha, that damn nickname wasn’t ever going away.

Finally, we opened the doors to see Wes, Kiersten, and Lisa waiting.