The taller woman held out a cup. “Here,” she offered. “Everything okay in here for you?”
Kerry took a sip of the fragrant beverage and swallowed it. “Mmm.” She glanced behind her. “Of course it is, and you know it.” She exhaled. “Thanks.”
She looked up and noticed Dar’s bloodshot eyes and weary expression.
446 Melissa Good
“C’mon.” She tucked a hand into the crook of her lover’s elbow. “I need to go sit down.” They walked downstairs, and Kerry settled in the corner of the couch, sipping her coffee and letting her head rest against the soft leather while Dar hunted out the remote and flipped on the large-screen TV.
“How are you doing?” the taller woman asked as she seated herself next to Kerry on the couch, putting her coffee down and clasping a hand over the blonde woman’s knee.
Kerry stifled a yawn. “Oh, I’m all right, I guess,” she answered softly. “I just keep trying not to think about it.” Her father’s angry, disgusted voice echoed loudly in her ears. “You know, I…I’m not sure what I expected,” she mused. “Anger, yeah, I thought he’d yell, and scream, but…” A pause. “I didn’t expect that.”
“How could you have?” Dar asked reasonably.
“Oh, I don’t know, Dar. Surely I should have seen that coming,” Kerry responded bitterly. “It was pretty naïve of me to think we’d just be able to talk this out, huh? That he’d listen to reason, or…” Her shoulders slumped. “Or that I’d matter to him as a person instead of window dressing,” she finished in a low voice.
“You couldn’t have predicted that,” her lover insisted. “Hell, I didn’t predict that, and I always expect the worst from people, not the best, like you do.” Kerry sighed. “I don’t know, maybe you’ve got the right idea.”
Dar tipped her chin up a bit. “Don’t let them take that away from you, my friend. I’d rather you think the best of people, not the worst. After all, where would I be if you did?”
The blonde woman rested her head against her hand. “In Washington, enjoying your holiday,” she muttered. “Instead of here, tired, hurting, and having to listen to my hard luck story.”
“Kerry.” Dar put a sympathetic hand on her back. “I wouldn’t trade where I am right now for anything.” Hooded green eyes peeked up at her.
“Honestly,” Dar commented softly, “I know it’s hard for you, and I’m sorry you had to go through this, but I don’t regret one single second of the past twenty-four hours, for my part of it.”
A tiny smile. “You’re a good friend, Dar.” Kerry reached out and took her hand, bringing it up and pressing it against her lips. “You’re the best friend anyone could ever hope for.” She felt the tears starting to well up, and she closed her eyes, fighting it. “And they can’t understand why I love you.” A sob escaped her. “Oh god.”
Dar pulled her close. “Easy, easy. I got you.”
“After everything he’s done,” Kerry whispered, “everything he’s taken from me, I couldn’t let him take you too.” She felt her composure shatter, and a wall of emotion swamped her senses. “I need you so much.”
Dar swallowed, feeling Kerry come apart, her words dissolving into hiccupping sobs that wrenched her body with little shudders. She took a deep breath and just hung on, murmuring reassurances and rocking Kerry in whatever comfort she could muster.
Kerry needed that. She needed Dar’s touch and the warmth of her body, and the comforting scent which surrounded her. “They hate me,” she got out.
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“Dar, I don’t want them to hate me for this.”
Dar’s jaw clenched, and she exhaled slowly. “I know.” She felt Kerry’s body jerk as she tried to catch her breath, and a soft moan escaped her.
“Shhh.”
“S’not fair,” Kerry whispered.
“No, it’s not,” Dar replied, rubbing her back.
A long pause, and Dar could feel the sobs slowly subsiding. She kept up her gentle petting until Kerry’s breathing evened out and steadied, and she could sense a calm returning to her lover.
“Was that stuff you told him true?” Kerry finally whispered in a hoarse tone.
Dar hesitated, not wanting to hurt her friend further. But lying, at this stage, would be pointless. “Yes. I was able to isolate those two pieces of information. I…you can look at it later if you want to.”
Another long pause. “Who’s Pamela?”
“Kerry, you don’t need to talk about this now. Wait a while,” Dar pleaded. “The information’s not going anywhere. Just rest. It’s been a hell of a long day, and we’re both exhausted.”
Red-rimmed green eyes peered up at her. “Just answer.” She sniffled, wiping at her eyes with one hand.
Dar sighed. “A woman your father’s been supporting for twenty years.
She has three kids, two boys and a girl. They’re his.”
Kerry’s jaw dropped.
“Yeah, and he has the balls to say anything about you,” Dar stated darkly. “That alone would blow his career out of the water.” Her eyes narrowed. “I hate hypocrites.” She gently dabbed at Kerry’s eyes with her sleeve.
“Wow,” Kerry breathed softly. “I can’t imagine that, no wonder he turned white when you said her name.” She felt better all of a sudden. “How do you know those kids are his?”
A soft snort. “DNA test results entered in the computer.”
“Oh.” The blonde woman closed her eyes. “Can I take a look at all that stuff later?”
“Sure.” Dar eased back into the corner of the couch and gently pulled Kerry down with her, tucking the smaller woman in between herself and the couch back. “Just relax now, you’re safe here.”
Kerry nodded “I know. Dar?”
“Mmm?”
“Do you think I should tell my mother about that?”
Whoa. Loaded question. “Let’s get some sleep before we talk about all this, okay?” Dar told her. “I’m too tired to think that through right now.”
Kerry looked up and gave her a little, weary smile. “Sorry, my head’s just spinning. You’re right.” She closed her eyes, and nestled closer. “I love you.”
Dar felt a wall of sleep overwhelming her. “Love you too,” she murmured, surrendering to her body’s demands.
Sea green eyes regarded her with wistful pride, before they too, closed.
Kerry woke near sunset, opening her eyes to see Dar still fast asleep, her body tangled around the blonde woman’s. That was all right, it gave her a 448 Melissa Good while to just sit and think, allowing herself to absorb fully the last twenty-four hours.
It hurt, she acknowledged, even though she’d resented her parents and dreaded flying home for those far-too-long holidays. But in a way, it was also kind of a relief to finally have it out in the open, and not have to pretend, or put them off constantly. She was free to live her life and do whatever she wanted to do.
Even if that whatever included this tall, beautiful woman who had pretty much put herself on the line for Kerry, in more ways than one. She sat thinking about Dar actually getting into the cockpit of a fighter jet just to come and find her, and a silly, incredulous smile edged onto her face. It was like a fairy tale, really. No one ever did that in real life, right? Of course not. And yet, she had, making nothing of it as though it were an everyday occurrence for her. “My hero,” Kerry whispered softly, curling a dark lock around one finger as she gazed at her sleeping lover’s face.
Her eyes fell on the neat bandage taped across the cut the stool had made in Dar’s neck, and she pursed her lips. She’s lucky she moves as fast as she does, Kerry reflected wryly. I would have clobbered her otherwise, poor thing. She felt very protective of Dar suddenly and felt a fierce surge of simple affection for her, beyond their physical relationship.
Idle words formed in her head, and she let them chase themselves around a little, ordering and reordering them. Finally she smiled wistfully to herself.
“Haven’t done that in a long, long time,” she whispered, winding her fingers around Dar’s, which were resting on her hip. “Didn’t think I even remembered how, but there’s something in you that touches something way down deep inside me, Dar. And it makes me feel things so strongly, it’s like seeing life in a million colors suddenly, instead of just a few.” The words floated by again, and she closed her eyes and recited them silently, tasting their depth.
The winds of life are circling
Over grass and under trees,
Touching my heart and lifting me up to soar.
And as my eyes fall upon you,
an ancient song surrounds me
Binding our souls together with sure hands.
The future lies an uncertain path
Under dark and stormy skies,
But I will walk in sunlight beside you forever.
Kerry smiled in silent wonder, then her eyes flickered open as a fingertip traced her lips. “Oh.”
“What’s so funny?” Dar inquired curiously, her voice husky from sleep.
“Life,” Kerry answered softly. “You don’t have to get up. Go back to sleep, Dar. You still look pretty tired.” She smoothed the disordered hair back out of the taller woman’s eyes. “I’m going to root around and scare us up some dinner.”
A frank, lazy grin appeared. “Scare is probably the appropriate word. I Tropical Storm 449
think I’ve got grapes, milk, some frozen pizzas, and a can of fruit cocktail,”
Dar admitted. “Maybe we should order in.”
“Ah ah ah.” Kerry shook her finger playfully. “Where’s the challenge in that? I like this, Dar. I get a chance to use my imagination. Give me a minute, okay?”
Blue eyes gentled. “You feeling better?”
Kerry exhaled. “Yeah, now that the shock is kind of over. I just want to get on with my life, you know?” She played with the edge of Dar’s sleeve. “It’s weird to realize I don’t have to worry about their opinions anymore.” A shrug. “And, I think it was also that I was just really tired, my defenses were sort of shot.”
Dar relaxed back into the soft leather and let her hands wander down the denim-covered leg resting over her own. She could feel the muscles tensing as she explored, and she put strong hands to use in a gentle massage. “Maybe in time they’ll change their minds,” she offered. “Kerry, no matter what, you’re still their daughter.”
Kerry exhaled slowly. “Do you think your mother will ever change her mind?” She looked up, right into Dar’s eyes.
Dar’s gaze dropped to the surface of the couch. “That’s different. She’s angry with me because she thinks I don’t understand how much she loved him.” Dar spoke quietly. “I told her… We got in a big argument after he died when I told her he’d gone the way he’d always wanted to, and she should just let him go.”
“Mmm.” Kerry twined her fingers with Dar’s.
“She told me I didn’t understand, and probably never would.” Dar remained silent for a moment. “Maybe she was right.”
“She must have loved him a great deal,” Kerry murmured.
“He was everything to her. She’d look at him, and it was like he was some god or something.” Dar sighed. “She knew, before they came to the house.
She’d been beside herself all day long.”
“Maybe, maybe they were soulmates,” Kerry said hesitantly, the word tasting sweet but strange on her tongue. “You know that old story—two halves, that kind of thing.”
A long moment of silence while Dar considered her words. “I…I never believed in any of that stuff, but…” She shrugged. “Who knows?” Her eyes studied the blonde woman. “Do you believe in that, in there being such a thing?”
Kerry kept quiet, thinking about the question. “I didn’t used to,” she admitted finally. “I never considered myself a romantic person, or someone who believed in great, mythical love.” A pause. “But, I don’t know, it’s a really nice kind of possibility, you know?”
“Yeah,” Dar murmured.
“When I was up in Michigan, I got to talk to an old pastor of mine, Pastor Robert. He used to talk about that all the time, so…” Kerry carefully kept her eyes on her hands. “And, um, well, he kind of told me about that, and how he thought you could tell. I mean, if you’ve found yours, that is.”
“Yeah?” Dar cleared her throat. “Just for argument’s sake, what did he say?” She propped her head up on one hand, and paid close attention to a 450 Melissa Good seam in the leather.
Kerry lifted her eyes and studied the dark, bowed head. “I, um…he…um, he said you can tell, because when you look at that person, you see everything you need to complete yourself.” Faintly startled blue eyes lifted and met hers.
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