“No, your feelings do you credit,” replied Mr. Darcy. Had she been able to encounter his eyes, she might have seen how he was struggling not to take her in his arms to offer her whatever comfort he could. “But how may I be of assistance to you? You are eager to away to Longbourn; shall I ask your maid to pack your bags?”

She nodded, still unable to look up. He quitted the room, and she heard him call to the servant. When he returned, he slipped quietly into the chair opposite her.

“Miss Bennet, will you allow me to sit with you until your aunt and uncle return? There is no need for you to make conversation, but I do not wish to leave you alone at a time like this.”

“As you wish, sir.” Elizabeth tried to breathe deeply and calmly. Mr. Darcy handed her his handkerchief while taking her own damp one. Somehow in the process he managed to reclaim her hand with his.

Elizabeth’s thoughts could not stay still. They fluttered from Lydia’s disgrace to Mr. Darcy to the shame her family would face in the future. How hopeless it seemed that there could be any resolution to this crisis! She felt both pity and furious anger at Lydia for the thoughtless behavior that would ruin so many of the family’s hopes, and then, with a sinking heart, connected those unhappy thoughts once again with the man next to her. Would she risk the reputation of the Darcy family name merely by association with them? She could not bear the idea she might do him harm, no matter how high the cost of preventing it. If that cost was never to see him again, she would pay it.

“Mr. Darcy,” she said, her voice trembling, “I find I must ask you to reconsider your… willingness to further my acquaintance with your sister. It is certain that in light of this event my family’s reputation will be severely harmed, and I would anticipate many good families of much lower standing than yours will no longer consent to receive us. Will you risk associating your sister with a family in such disgrace?”

“Miss Bennet, what has your sister done that my sister would not have done were it not for an accident of timing? Surely there are no two people more likely to understand your position than Georgiana and I.”

She could hardly believe her ears. Even with the many changes he had wrought in his behavior since Rosings, could he possibly be putting aside his pride so far as to compare Georgiana with Lydia?

“But in this case what you understand and what society understands are two very different matters. And I must argue with you, sir, in your comparison; though there are similarities in their situations, Miss Darcy is far more sensible than my heedless, thoughtless sister.”

“They both took the same risk,” he said with a dark look. “Miss Bennet, if you are attempting to tell me that you have for your own reasons changed your mind from the preferences you stated earlier, please tell me so at once, and I shall trouble you no more. But do not use your family as an excuse.”

“You confuse my meaning entirely, Mr. Darcy; my feelings have not changed, but I am concerned about the wisdom of this course. Or perhaps,” she said, hoping to inject a note of playfulness into the discussion, which seemed to be headed to dangerous ground, “I should say that my feelings have not changed recently, as we both have reason to believe my opinions not to be completely immutable.”

“So long as you see no reason to change your opinions further, I see no reason for complaint.”

The warmth of his gaze brought blushes to her cheeks and tremulous sensations new to her. She could not look away, and she longed to find a witty comment to lighten the atmosphere, but found all words failed her just as she needed them most.

He seemed as much caught as she, his fingers lightly stroking the back of her captive hand. Elizabeth felt hypnotized by the soft tracery of his touch, and was quite taken aback when he abruptly released her hand and pulled away, the old cold and distant look returning to his face.

She looked away, confused, wondering what had happened. Could she not manage to stay in accord with him for the length of a conversation? Or was she somehow misinterpreting him, as she had done so often in the past? She resolved that this time, at least, she would find a way to ask him, rather than assume, what he meant by his behavior.

Taking a deep breath, she said impertinently, “Pray, sir, what brings on the dread Darcy look of disapproval?”

“The dread Darcy look of disapproval?” he replied with a raised eyebrow and the slightest of smiles.

Elizabeth nodded gravely. “What sin could I have committed, I wonder? Could it have been something I said? Something I did? Hmmm—might you have taken a dislike to the style of my hair, or perhaps the color of my dress?”

Darcy could not help smiling, pleased to see her teasing him again. “As you know full well, Miss Bennet, I approve very much of everything about you. In fact, sometimes I approve far too much, and must then disapprove, not of you, but of myself.”

“Disapprove of yourself! For approving of me? Come, sir, that is hardly friendly.”

“Exactly my point, Miss Bennet.”

“So approval leads to unfriendliness! I must assume I am supposed to ask how this could be, but I shall not fall into your trap, sir.”

It has been too long since I have crossed wits with Elizabeth, Darcy thought, but I must take great care on this point. He said lightly, “I shall decipher the riddle for you anyway. I have always prided myself on my self-control, which has served me well until now. Since meeting you, however, I have discovered the sad truth—that my self-control is far more limited than ever I thought, though fortunately this difficulty seems to be limited to the times when I am in your most approved presence. I am sure you will appreciate my difficulty. Given how far my self-control eroded when you still disliked me, imagine how much more difficult it is to maintain in the presence of your smiles. Hence, I must disapprove of too much approval, lest it lead me to dangerous ground.”

Dangerous ground, indeed, thought Elizabeth. “Mr. Darcy, I have every faith in your gentlemanly behavior.”

He winced. She could not know how much he had been hurt by her words in Hunsford about his ungentlemanly behavior, so he tried to keep any bitterness out of his voice as he acknowledged the unhealed wound. “But as you yourself have pointed out in the past, I am quite capable of behaving in an ungentlemanlike manner.”

“Pray, sir, do not remind me of the unjust and misinformed things I have said in the past! In cases such as these, a good memory is unpardonable.”

“That particular reproof was well-deserved, as I recall.”

Elizabeth flushed. “My philosophy is to think only of the past as it gives me pleasure, so I prefer instead to think about my current better understanding of you, which includes acknowledging that your behavior is gentlemanly in every way! But I shall try to heed your warning and not test your self-control, lest you be irreparably harmed by discovering its limits.”

“Miss Bennet, I urge you to take care,” he said intently, teasing put aside. “The only thing that separates me from this”—here he touched her letters—“is that self-control you mock. There is otherwise no difference between Mr. Wickham and me.”

“Do not,” she cried, “do not ever let me hear you comparing yourself in any way to that… that scoundrel! There is a world of difference between you!”

He smiled slightly. “Perhaps I should learn to criticize myself more often, for the pleasure of hearing you defend me.”

“I speak only the truth, and you, sir, know enough of my frankness to believe that!”

“Elizabeth, you are playing with fire. Trust me when I tell you not to trust me too far.”

His use of her Christian name felt very intimate, and she sensed that some line had been crossed. She knew instinctively this was the moment when she should look away and change the subject, but instead she found herself saying, “And am I the only one playing with fire?”

“Touché,” he said softly. “But do not say that I did not warn you.” Taking her hand, he lifted her to her feet. “Elizabeth,” he breathed as he slowly lowered his head and allowed his lips to caress hers for a brief moment.

Elizabeth felt the power of his touch run through her, shocked by both the sensation and her acquiescence—nay, her cooperation—in the kiss. What did it mean that she desired his kisses? Was he as shocked at her behavior as she was?

“Elizabeth,”—his voice made her name a caress—“Tell me to leave. Please.” Even as he spoke, he pulled her closer and sought her mouth again, more urgently this time.

She allowed herself a moment of stolen pleasure, then, steeling her resolve, forced herself to say in the steadiest possible voice, “Mr. Darcy. You must stop, sir.” She dropped her eyes, knowing instinctively she must not meet his gaze.

He inhaled sharply. “Yes, so I must.” He firmed his resolve and began to pull away, but could not resist the temptation to let his lips linger a moment on her hair as he did so.

Unfortunately, it was then and not a moment later that the door opened, revealing Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner.

Chapter 2

Elizabeth and Darcy hastily moved away from each other, but their faces told it all. There was a moment of shocked silence before Mrs. Gardiner, noting both Elizabeth’s blushes and the tears returning to her eyes, hurried to her niece and took her aside, while a furious-looking Mr. Gardiner eyed Darcy.

Darcy exhaled through clenched teeth. Of all the situations to be caught in! What was he to say—My apologies that I was taking advantage of your niece while she was too upset to stop me? Oh, and by the way, my father’s godson has seduced your other niece and they have disappeared somewhere in London, and now you should trust me to help you find him?

“Mr. Darcy,” Mr. Gardiner said coldly, “Perhaps you will be so kind as to join me outside, as I have a few things to discuss with you.” He held the door, motioning to Darcy.

Darcy gritted his teeth and followed, casting a worried look at Elizabeth, who was now in tears in her aunt’s arms—over Lydia rather than over him, he hoped. This was without question the most mortifying situation he had been in since—well, since the Hunsford parsonage, and he certainly had no one to blame but himself for this one.

Mr. Gardiner turned to face him. “Well, Mr. Darcy? I await an explanation of your behavior.”

“Sir, I can offer no acceptable explanation,” Darcy said stiffly. “My behavior obviously merits the severest of reproaches, and I stand prepared to take full responsibility for it.”

“And do you often reduce young women to tears with your advances?” Elizabeth’s distress clearly shocked Mr. Gardiner the most. After their visits to Pemberley it was evident to him that Darcy was very much in love with Elizabeth, which by itself had much inclined him in his favor, and all reports on him from his servants and the Lambton inhabitants indicated a man of strict honor. This behavior was incomprehensible to him.

“Sir, you misunderstand the situation. Her distress is unrelated to me. Miss Bennet will tell you she was already upset when I arrived. In fact it was my attempts to comfort her which turned into the cause for your concern. But Miss Bennet is indeed very upset regarding a separate matter, about which I must insist that you speak with her immediately.”

“And I must insist, sir, on knowing your intentions toward my niece!”

Darcy ground his teeth. Clearly he would not be able to raise Lydia’s situation until he dealt with the infuriated Mr. Gardiner. “My intentions are completely honorable.”

“Do I assume then you will accept my decision should I insist on taking steps to protect my niece’s reputation?”

“Sir, I would marry her tomorrow if I could obtain her consent!” Darcy snapped, his temper fraying. “If you choose to insist on an immediate engagement, which is certainly within your rights, I would have neither reason nor desire to object, but I am afraid the same cannot be said for Miss Bennet!”

Mr. Gardiner blinked, surprised. “Do you have some reason to believe she would not consent to marry you?”

So Elizabeth had not told her family of his proposal! Little wonder that Mr. Gardiner was so furious! Darcy replied in a calmer but brittle voice, “I had assumed you were aware, sir, that she already refused me, not four months ago.”