Cynthia Cartier - Wings

Alan shook himself out and looked like he was convulsing. “Okay, I’m relaxed now.” And he slid down in his seat like a drunk.

Liddy flew home and was happy. During the weeks that followed, she met Alan in Kansas City, St. Louis and back in Chicago. No matter how she felt when she left to see him, she was always light when she returned home. You couldn’t droop around Alan Bradon, it just wasn’t possible.

When Alan kissed her it was sweet and soft and it made her smile. He made her smile. Together they flew all over the East Coast and Alan’s flying skills didn’t improve a bit. Maybe it was because he was so busy talking or maybe it was because some people love being in the air, but not at the controls.

They spent a lot of time together driving the back roads all over New England and eating at little mom and pop places. They’d explore, eat and then go back to whatever little field they had landed at, climb into the plane and fly home.

Alan insisted they tell each other their life stories from A-Z. It was like talking to a girlfriend. No subject failed to interest him. One day as they broke peanuts out of their shells and tossed the husks on the plank floor of a little burger joint in Vermont, they talked about everything and nothing.

“Okay, your first kiss?” asked Alan.

“Rodney Carter, seventh grade in his daddy’s barn, during one of Holly Grove’s biggest snow storms ever.”

“First kiss?” Liddy asked.

“Eileen Cromwell—”

“Cromwell, of course,” said Liddy with a haughty air.

“Hey, she was very hot, first grade at her mother’s birthday party.”

“First grade? A little young.”

“I was an early bloomer.”

“Why am I not surprised.” Liddy shook her head with feigned disapproval.

“Prude. Okay, engagement?” asked Alan.

“Nope,” said Liddy.

“You’ve never been engaged?”

“No, never. You have I take it?”

“How is it possible that you’ve never been engaged? What are you forty-seven, forty eight?” Alan asked with a puff and a grin.

Liddy tossed a handful of peanuts at him, “I’m younger than you old man. Has it occurred to you that some people don’t get into situations without thinking them through?” Liddy opened her eyes wide and cocked her head. “Maybe you’re just impulsive and irresponsible. Oh, of course you are—you’re Crazy Man.”

“Well, if we could all be as perfect as you, Liddy Hall, the world would be a better place.”

“Do you really think so, Alan Lionel Bradon? Thanks. Okay, tell me about this engagement.”

“Engagements actually, there were two. But now I don’t want to talk about it. I feel so damaged.” Alan held the back of his hand to his forehead.

“No you don’t. Spit it out,” Liddy demanded.

“Alright. Well, the first one was my mother’s doing. She’s very sneaky, and I broke that one off. The second one was my doing, and Veronica Wyndham broke it off, thankfully.”

“Really, you mean that? You weren’t hurt?”

“I was at first, for about a week. Then I bounced back like a champ. You’ve gotta look for the silver lining you know? There are too many fishies in the sea, Sweet Cakes, to get tangled in one net.”

“Is that right?”

“Prove me wrong why don’t you,” Alan challenged and lobbed a shell into Liddy’s hair. “Okay, first love?” he asked.

Liddy’s smile fell from her face.

“I saw that,” said Alan.

“Saw what?”

“When I said first love, your face crumbled. What’s his name and I want an address,” Alan tried to get a smile back on Liddy.

She shook her head slightly side to side. “I don’t want to play anymore.”

“Okay, let’s not play, but I’d like to know.”

Liddy stared out the window and broke open a few more peanuts. It had been months since she had spoken of Reid, and she didn’t want to break her silence.

“Please,” Alan asked and set his hand on top of Liddy’s. “Please.”

“He was an Air Force pilot. His name was Reid Trent. He was killed,” she tried not to hear the words as she spoke them or let them draw memories.

“I’m sorry, Liddy.”

“Thanks.” She looked back at him. “Now say something funny.”

“Funny but true or just funny?” asked Alan.

“Funny but true,” said Liddy.

“You make me feel nauseous sometimes, but in a good way.”

Liddy laughed.

“Okay, you now, funny but true,” said Alan.

“You’ve reminded me of someone since I first met you and I finally figured out who.”

“Who?”

“A petite little redhead—she was a damn good pilot. I don’t mean the good pilot part reminds me of you. Goodness knows I don’t mean that…” Liddy rolled her eyes. “… just the little gal herself that you remind me of.”

“Well, I would have preferred you said a big good-looking lumberjack, but okay. Tell me, was she a good dresser?”

“Quite fashionable,” said Liddy.

“Alright, I’m taking it as compliment then.”

“Oh, it is Crazy Man, it definitely is.”

Alan was always attending a high-society social function or fundraiser and wanted Liddy to go along. It was hard enough to try and relax in the man’s home with his servants and marble floors, the idea of being in some ballroom or mansion, surrounded by the trappings of pish and posh, was not something she wanted to fit into her day.

Liddy was sitting on a big sofa in one of Alan’s sitting rooms, and he was sitting next to her. Their shoes were off, and their bare feet rested on the gilded sofa table.

“My Aunt Judith’s seventy-fifth birthday party is next month. I want you to come with me.” Alan slid his hand under Liddy’s and slipped his fingers between hers.

“Don’t you mean Birthday Ball, or is it an event?” Liddy asked sarcastically.

Alan grabbed her chin and kissed her. “You’re going with me.”

“Alan, we’ve talked about this. This is where I get to win.”

“No, it’s my turn to win. You wouldn’t go to the Langley Ball, the War Bond Banquet or to my parent’s anniversary party. That’s three wins right there.”

“Alan, why can’t we just keep doing this?” Liddy swung her finger back and forth between them. “I don’t do balls and gatherings, I’m more of a barn dance girl. I wouldn’t even know what to wear.”

“Funny that you should say that…” Alan grinned and popped up from the sofa. He took a large wrapped box from behind the door of the credenza and set it on Liddy’s lap. Then he sat down in front of her on the sofa table and beamed.

Liddy looked down at the gold foiled box that was tied with a gold satin bow. “Alan, what is this?”

“Just open it.”

She looked at him and bit down on her bottom lip and took a deep breath.

“Come on, open it.”

Liddy untied the wide ribbon and let it fall over the sides of her legs. She lifted the lid and the inside was filled to the top with a shimmery bronze fabric. She stared at it for a moment, and then, with both hands, gripped the front edged of the sofa cushion and looked at him.

Alan picked it up and stood to let the length of the dress fall to the floor. “Don’t you like it?” He was beaming.

“It’s beautiful. I think you’ll look lovely in it.”

“Liddy, I’m serious about this. My family and friends are beginning to think I’ve made you up.”

“What exactly is it you’re telling them? You’re hot for a female pilot from Missouri, who lived in a little homemade trailer and now lives in a tiny little house, both of which would fit in their bathrooms. Oh and what about the whole Army thing? How impressed are they Alan? I’m sure they can’t wait to meet me.”

“You’re sounding like quite a snob, Liddy Hall.”

“You’re calling me a snob?”

“No, I just said you’re sounding like a snob. There’s a difference.”

“Is there?”

“Look, just because you don’t want me to meet your family, doesn’t mean I don’t want you to meet mine.”

“I never said I didn’t want you to meet my family, which by the way is an uncle and a dog. Oh, yes and a cat.”

“But I haven’t met them, have I, or any of your friends. Why is that?”

“Are we having a fight?”

“No, we’re having a discussion.”

“It feels like a fight.”

“You’re changing the subject.” Alan moved the box to the table and floated the dress back into it, and then he sat back on the sofa next to her. “This is important to me, Liddy. Please, say you’ll go. What’s the worst that could happen?”

“I try never to think about the worst that can happen.”

“Okay then, don’t think about it and just be there with me.”

Liddy took in a deep breath and held it. Then let it out and wrinkled-up her forehead. “Okay, but you’re wearing the dress.”

“You got it, Sweet Cakes.”

Alan booked a room for Liddy at the Drake Hotel and when she checked-in the bronze dress was hanging from the door of the wardrobe. An invitation to the 75^th Birthday Celebration had been left on the bed. Pick you up at 7:00 p.m. had been scribbled across it in Alan’s handwriting.

When he arrived that evening, Liddy had been dressed for half an hour and then sat on the edge of the bed and didn’t move until she heard the knock. When she opened the door, Alan’s eyes widened as he looked her up and down and whistled.

“Not bad, baby, not bad at all.” He twirled her around. “Not sure it wouldn’t have looked better on me, but you do it justice, I think.”

Liddy tried to smile but felt she might be sick.

“What’s wrong?” He held her chin. “Liddy, you’re so beautiful.”

“I’m doing this for you, you know that, right?”

“I know, and it means a lot to me, doll.” Alan led Liddy down the hall, down the elevator and to his car. She had liked the way he had guided her with his hand on the small of her back before, but now it was like he was pushing her off a cliff.

On the ride across town he tried to make jokes, but Liddy felt she needed to prepare herself for the opposite of Alan. And she was right. As they walked into the building, she stuck out like a sore thumb and she knew it. Her hair was down, theirs was up. These women floated and she walked like her feet actually hit the ground; they knew why they were there, and she knew why she shouldn’t be there.

When they hit the door to the main ballroom, Alan’s mother glided over immediately. Mrs. Alan Bradon the III scanned her from head to toe and back again, and then she held her hand up in front of Liddy like she wanted her to put something in it. “Alan dear, is this your Lidia?”

It didn’t feel natural to Liddy to set her hand on top of the woman’s cupped palm that way, but she did. And then Alan’s mother allowed Liddy’s hand to rest in her palm briefly before she drew her hand back to her side like a butterfly retreating from a flower.

“It’s Liddy, mother.”

“Oh, of course it is. It’s wonderful you could be here tonight, dear. There are so many people who are looking forward to meeting you. Alan darling, your Aunt Judith is sitting by your father, why don’t you go and say hello and I’ll introduce Lidia to the other guests.”

Liddy’s eyes practically popped out of her head as she shook, No, No, No, microscopically but firmly at Alan. Before she knew it, his mother had pushed her across the room and Alan was gone.

Liddy met Constances and Reginalds and Carolines and lots of IIIs and IVs. Formality was thick and she forced a smile and said as little as possible. As Mrs. A was running out of introductions, Liddy sensed the probing was about to begin, and she searched for Alan in the crowd.

“So, Lidia, what is it that your family does?”

“It’s just Liddy, and my parents are dead. I have an uncle, and he’s a pilot and works on planes.”

“You’re in aviation then?”

“I’m a pilot. I deliver planes and teach how to fly them.”

“Oh.”

And that was the first of many ‘Ohs’ that she received that night. Just when she thought things couldn’t get worse, one of Alan’s old college roommates swept her onto the dance floor. Liddy kicked and tripped his feet until he gave up and escorted her back to the sidelines. The man was actually trying to be nice, she believed that, but she also believed he was now feeling very sorry for Alan, ‘Poor boy, what must he be thinking?’ Liddy ended up in front of Aunt Judith, who looked her up and down grimly and said, “Who is this?”

It was about that time that Alan appeared behind her with his big, stupid, smiling face. She might have taken a swipe at him had they been alone. He took her arm and didn’t let go for the rest of the night. But by that time the damage had been done, and Liddy wanted to crawl into a deep dark hole.