Danielle Steel - Wings

“Maybe you're right,” Cassie said quietly. “It just seems so sad.”

“It is sad,” he agreed. “No one ever said it wasn't. It's sad when anyone goes down. But it's a risk we all take, and some of us love. You too.” He put a hand under her chin and reminded her silently of how much she loved to fly and how willing she was to take chances. “You would do the same thing, given half a chance, you little fool. You ever try to go on one of those damn world tours, and I'll set fire to your plane. Count on it.”

“Thanks.” She grinned up at him, and then he tugged at her arm in excitement.

“Hey… take a look at this… there goes Chris… come on… come on… head up there…” He was heading for an altitude trophy in Nick's plane, and he almost disappeared as they watched him. He had good steady hands, and a seriousness that made him perfect for this kind of competition. He had none of Cassie's excitement or sheer grit; all he really had was endurance. And when he landed, Nick was amazed by how far he'd gone. They hurried over to where Pit and Oona and some of Cassie's sisters were standing with their children. Glynnis and Megan were both hugely pregnant again, and Colleen had been looking a little green around the gills of late, which had made Oona suspect she was pregnant again too, but hadn't yet said it. They were a prolific group. This would be the fourth for Megan and Colleen, the fifth for Glynnis.

“Good thing too,” Cassie whispered under her breath as she chatted with Nick, “if I'm never going to have any. They can have all the kids they want, as far as I'm concerned.” Lately she had begun to think she never wanted a husband or children.

“You'll have kids too, don't kid yourself. Why shouldn't you?” Nick never believed her when she said she'd never marry or have children. She didn't really believe it herself. But she knew she didn't want any of that for a long, long time, if ever. All she wanted was airplanes.

“What makes you so sure I'll have kids, Nick?” she challenged him.

“Because you come from a family that multiply like rabbits.”

“Oh thanks a lot.” She was still laughing when Bobby Strong found her, and glanced at Nick awkwardly. He always had the feeling that Nick didn't like him. Moments later, having said very little to either of them, Nick went off to hang out with the other pilots.

Half an hour later, they announced that Chris had won a prize for setting the altitude record. And her father was beside himself with excitement. He went off to find Chris, and Oona went to find drinks with the girls, and the younger children. Bobby stood watching the show with her, as tiny red and blue and silver planes did stunts and rolls, and lazy spins in the air, crazy eights, and double eights, and a few tricks Cassie had never heard of. Just watching them took your breath away, and more than once the crowd gasped as disaster seemed imminent, and then cheered when there was a last minute save. She was used to it, but it was always exciting.

“What were you thinking just then?” Bobby had begun watching her face. It had been filled with light and an expression of total rapture as she watched a plane do an outside loop; it was a stunt Jimmy Doolittle had invented ten years before, and it really impressed her. The pilot then finished with a flourish by doing a low-level inverted pass, away from the crowd, so no one was endangered. Bobby watched the look on her face with fascination. And then she turned and smiled at him, almost sadly.

“I was thinking that I wish I were up there doing that,” she said honestly. “It looks like so much fun.” All she wanted was to be one of them.

“I think I'd get sick,” he said with equal honesty, and she grinned at him, as a vendor wandered by with cotton candy.

“You probably would. I almost have a couple of times.” She had almost spilled the beans then, and had to remind herself to be careful. “Negative G's will do it to you. You get those in a stall, just before you recover. It feels like your stomach is going to fly right out of your mouth… but it doesn't.” She grinned.

“I don't know how you can like all this, Cass. It scares me to death.” He looked handsome and blond and very young as he stood admiring her, and she was growing, day by day, to be more of a woman.

“It's in my bones, I guess.”

He nodded, worried that that was true. “That's too bad about Amelia Earhart.”

She nodded too. “Yes, it is. Nick says that all pilots accept those possibilities. It can happen to anyone.” She looked up at the sky. “Anyone here too. I guess they figure it's worth it.”

“Nothing's worth risking your life,” Bobby disagreed with her, “unless you have to, like in a war, or to save someone you love.”

“That's the trouble”- Cassie looked at him with a sad smile-” most pilots would risk anything to fly. But other people don't understand that.”

“Maybe that's why women shouldn't, Cass,” he said quietly and she sighed.

“You sound like my father.”

“Maybe you should listen to him.”

She wanted to say “I can't,” but she knew she couldn't say that to him. She could only say that to Nick. He was the only human being who knew the whole truth about her, and accepted it. No one else really knew her. Especially not Bobby.

She saw Chris walking toward them then, and she ran to him. He was carrying his medal, his face was glowing with pride, and Pat was walking on air right behind him.

“First medal at seventeen!” he was telling anyone who would listen. “That's my man!” He was handing out beers, and slapping everyone on the back, including Chris and Bobby. Chris was basking in his father's love and approval. Cassie was watching them, fascinated by how desperate her father was for Chris's success in the air, yet at the same time how adamant he was that she never get there. She was ten times the flier Chris was, or better still, but her father would never acknowledge it, or even know it.

Nick came over to shake hands with Chris, and the boy was elated by his victory, and then he went off with Nick to meet some of the other pilots. It was an exciting day for him, and a day Pat O'Malley had waited fifty-one years for. And as far as he was concerned, this was only the beginning. Instead of seeing that this was the top of Chris's skill, he wanted more. He was already talking about next year, and Cassie felt sorry for Chris then. She knew how much their father meant to him, and that no matter what it cost him, he would do anything to please him.

The O'Malley clan were in high spirits. They were almost the last ones to leave, and Bobby went home with them for dinner. Nick went out to celebrate with his flying friends, and he looked pretty well oiled by the time he left the field. But he knew Chris was flying the Bellanca back to O'Malley Airport, and he could hop a ride in Pat's truck, so he didn't have to worry about flying or driving.

Oona had cooked platters of fried chicken for them in the morning before they left, and there was com on the cob, and salad and baked potatoes. There was a ham too, and she had baked blueberry pie and made ice cream once back at the house. It was a real feast, and Pat poured Chris a full glass of Irish whiskey.

“Drink up, lad, you're the next ace in this family!” Chris struggled with the drink, and Cassie watched them, feeling sad. She felt left out somehow. She should have been flying with them, and basking in her father's praise, and she knew she couldn't. She wondered if she ever would. But the only fate that seemed open to her was that of her sisters, having another baby every year, and condemned to their kitchens. It seemed a terrible life to her, although she loved them all, and her mother, but she would have rather died than spend her life the way they had.

Cassie noticed too that Bobby was very sweet to all of them. He was kind to her sisters, and adorable to all their children. He was a gentle man, and he would make a wonderful husband. Her mother pointed it out to her again when she was helping clean up in the kitchen. And afterward, she and Bobby went for a long walk, and he surprised her when he talked to her about flying.

“I was watching you a lot today, Cass, and I know what all that means to you. And you may think I'm crazy, but I want you to promise me you'll never do any of that crazy stuff. I really don't want you to fly. It's not that I don't want you to have fun. But I don't want you to get hurt. You know… like Amelia Earhart.” It seemed reasonable to him, and she was touched, but Cassie laughed nervously. The idea of promising anyone that she wouldn't fly made her shudder.

“I'm not going to fly around the world, if that's what you're worried about,” she said with an anxious smile. But he shook his head, he meant a lot more than that, and she knew it.

“That's not what I mean. I mean I don't want you flying at all.” He had only seen a glimmer of how dangerous it was, but watching the stunts at the air show had convinced him. There was no question that there were risks in flying, and two years before there had been a terrible tragedy at the same air show. Bobby was no fool, and he knew the magic it held for her. Simply put, he didn't want to lose her. “I don't want you learning to fly, Cass. I know you want to. But it's just too dangerous. Your father is right. And it's much too dangerous for a woman.”

“I don't think that's a reasonable thing to ask,” she said quietly. She didn't want to lie to him, but she also didn't want to tell him that she'd been flying regularly with Nick for over a year now. “I think you have to trust my judgment on that.”

“I want you to promise me you won't fly,” he said, showing a strength and stubbornness she had never seen before. She was impressed, but she wasn't going to promise.

“That's unreasonable. You know how much I love to fly”

“That's why I'm asking you to promise, Cass. I think you would be just the one to take chances.”

“Believe me, I wouldn't. I'm careful… and I'm good… that is, I would be. Look, Bobby, please… don't do this…”

“Then I want you to think about it. This is very important to me.” So is flying to me, she wanted to scream. It was the only thing she cared about, and now he wanted to take it from her. What was wrong with all of them? Bobby, her father, even Chris. Why did they want to take something away from her that she loved so much? Only Nick understood. He was the only one who knew, and cared how she felt about it.

Though at that exact moment, Nick Calvin was passed out cold in the arms of a girl he had met at the air show. She had bright red hair, and brightly painted lips, and as he nestled close to her, he smiled and whispered, “Cassie.”

Cassie's schedule at Bradley was more demanding than it had been as a senior in high school, but she managed to juggle it anyway, and now she and Nick met twice a week, always on Saturdays, and sometimes on a weekday morning. Her father wasn't aware of her schedule, and it was easy for both of them. And she had started working as a waitress in order to repay Nick for the fuel, even if she couldn't afford to pay him for the lessons. But he had never expected any payment from her. He did it for sheer love and pleasure.

She was getting better each time they flew, refining some fine points, and flying every plane she could so as to learn their differences and their quirks. She flew the Jenny, the old Gypsy Moth, Nick's Bellanca, the de Havilland 4, and even the lumbering old Handley. Nick wanted her to fly everything she could, and he had her perfecting all her techniques and honing her skills with great precision. He had even taught her some rescue techniques, and told her all the details of some of his more illustrious forced landings and near misses while fighting the Germans. There was very little she didn't know about flying the Jenny or the Bellanca or even the Handley, which Nick had brought with him because it was so much heavier and harder to fly, and had two engines.

She spent less time at her father's airport now, since she had farther to go to school, but she still hung around whenever she could, and she and Nick would exchange a conspiratorial smile, whenever their paths crossed.

She was working on an engine one day, in a back hangar, when she was surprised to see her father walk in with Nick. They were talking about buying a new plane, and her father thought it might be too expensive. It was a used Lockheed Vega.

“It's worth it, Pat. It's a heavy plane, but it's a beautiful machine. I checked one out the last time I was in Chicago.”

“And who do you think is going to fly it? You, and me. And the others are just going to bring it down in the trees. It's a damn fine machine, Nick, and there aren't five men here I'd trust to fly it. Maybe not even two.”