“Is it Nick that's bothering you, Cass?” He knew she was haunted by the man, and he was worried about how close they had obviously still been the last time she saw him. He was sorry things hadn't worked out for them. But she couldn't have waited for him indefinitely if Nick had told her not to. Pat had tried to tell him it was a mistake, setting her free like that, but young people never listen. Not that Nick was so young anymore. He was old enough to know a thing or two. But like most men, he was foolish when it came to women. “You can't pine for him, Cassie. Not married to another man,” She nodded, loath to tell him the truth. She was so ashamed of her own bad judgment. Desmond had taken her in completely.
‘There's something you're not telling me, Cassandra Maureen,” her father prodded her, and in the end, in spite of herself, she told him. And he was stunned at what she said. It was everything Nick had warned them of and predicted.
“He was right, Dad. Completely.”
“What arc you going to do now?” He wanted to kill the man. What a rotten trick to pull on a girl like her, to exploit her so totally for his own gain and glory.
“I don't know. Fly the tour, obviously. I really do owe him that. I wouldn't back out on him, though I don't think he knows that. Ill do it. And then”- she took a breath, there weren't many choices-” we'll get divorced, I guess. I'm sure somehow he'll make it look as though I did something terrible. He'll manipulate the press somehow to his advantage. He's much more complicated than I realized. And a whole lot meaner.”
“Will he give you anything?” her father wondered. He was a very rich man, and he could have paid her handsomely for her disappointment.
“I doubt it. I'll make my fee for the tour. He was going to reduce it because of the postponement, but he didn't. He considers that a major gift. I don't need more than that. I don't want anything from him. He's been generous enough.” And she could live for years on the career he had helped her achieve, that was payment enough. She wanted nothing more from Desmond.
“I'm sorry, Cassie. I'm so very sorry.” He was deeply distressed by what he'd heard from her, and they both agreed not to upset her mother.
“Just take care of yourself on the tour. That's all that's important now. You can sort the rest out later.”
“Maybe I'll fly bombers to England when I come back, like Jackie Cochran.” That June, she had copiloted a Lockheed Hudson bomber to England, proving once and for all that women could fly heavy airplanes.
“Oh be gone with you,” her father rolled his eyes with a groan, “flying bombers to England. You'll give me another heart attack. I swear, you'll make me rue the day I ever took you up in an airplane. Can't you do something ordinary for a while, like answer phones somewhere, or cook, or help your mother clean house?” But he was teasing her, and she knew it. He knew there was no hope of her giving up the skies now. “Fly safely, Cass,” he warned her before she left. “Be careful. Watch everything, with all your senses.” He knew she was good at that. He had never seen a better pilot.
And the next morning when she left, they all cried at seeing her go, and knowing the danger of the Pacific tour. And Cassie and Billy cried right along with them. Pat and another pilot flew them to Chicago, and Billy and Cassie flew back to California commercially from there. It was pleasant actually, for a change. The Skygirls made a big fuss over her, and she and Billy sat and talked about their month of training. It had been peaceful for them, hanging out together at the airport all summer, just like the old days, only better. They were older now. They had interesting days ahead. And in spite of Desmond, Cassie was getting excited about the tour.
“What are you going to do about a place to stay when you get back to Newport Beach?” Billy asked her quietly as they flew back.
“I haven't thought of that. I don't know… I can't stay at a hotel, I guess.” She suspected Desmond wouldn't like that, because of the scandal. But she couldn't imagine staying in his house with him after everything that had happened. He hadn't called her once in the past two months, and the only letters from him were from his lawyers or his office.
“You can stay with me, if you want. If anyone finds out, we can say it's for training. What do you think?” Billy offered.
“I think I'd like to,” she said honestly. She had nowhere else to go now.
She went home with him that night, with some clothes she'd brought from Illinois, and some flight overalls. And she went to work with him the next day, in his old jalopy. With all the money he made, Billy still hadn't bought himself a decent car, and he didn't plan to. He loved his old Model A, even though at least half the time it never started.
“For a guy who flies the best airplanes in the sky, how can you drive a car like this?” she asked at three-thirty in the morning.
“Easy,” he grinned. “I love it.”
They were hard at work by the time the sun came up, and they didn't finish until late that night. They were also scheduled for a practice night flight. Cassie didn't even see Desmond until the second day, and only then because she ran into him in a hangar near his office. She was surprised to see him there, but he was giving someone a tour, and he dropped by to see her afterward. He wanted to make sure she wasn't going to say anything inappropriate to the press. And he was no nicer to her than he had been the last time she saw him.
“Where exactly is it you're staying?” He had suspected she wouldn't come back to him, and he didn't really care, as long as she kept it quiet. He had packed up all her things and put them in storage in coded boxes in one of the hangars. The only thing he didn't want was for her to create a scandal. But he also knew her well enough to know she wouldn't. She had too much integrity, too much pride. She wanted to do the Pacific tour for him, and do it right. She had no desire to do anything to hurt him.
“I'm staying with Billy,” she said with a dignified look, wearing one of her old flight suits.
“Just be discreet about it,” he said coldly. But he knew better than anyone that at this point even a tiff reported by the press wouldn't really hurt them.
“Obviously. I don't think anyone even suspects that I'm staying at Billy's.” She had thought about calling Nancy Firestone before that, but Cassie had been embarrassed to ask to stay with her and Jane. They weren't close anymore, and Billy had invited her to stay at his place. The one thing she couldn't have done was stay at a hotel. That would have wound up instantly in the papers, unless Desmond was there with her, which of course he wasn't.
Oddly enough, she ran into Nancy Firestone later that day, right after she had run into Desmond. Nancy was leaving work, and Cassie was running out to grab something to eat for herself and Billy, before coming back for a night of meetings.
“It's getting close, isn't it?” Nancy said with a smile. Everyone at Williams Aircraft was counting the days and the minutes. And Cassie looked tired and strained as she smiled and nodded. Seeing Desmond at the end of a long day hadn't done anything to lift Cassie's spirits. He was so unkind to her, so cold, it was impossible to imagine that there had ever been anything more than business between them. But at least Nancy was warmer to her than she'd been in a long time, and it was good to see her.
“It's getting very close,” Cassie smiled. “How's Jane? I miss her. I haven't seen her in ages.”
“She's fine.” The two women stood looking at each other for a long moment, and Cassie suddenly realized that Nancy was looking at her strangely. She looked as though she wanted to say something to her, but she wasn't sure. And for an instant, Cassie wondered if she had ever done anything to offend her, if that was why Nancy had been so cool after Cassie had married Desmond. Or maybe she'd just felt awkward with Cassie's new position. The thought of it almost made Cassie smile. If that was what had bothered her, she could relax now.
“We should get together some time,” Cassie said warmly, trying to be friendly in memory of old times. It was Nancy who had made her feel at home when she'd first come to Los Angeles and was so lonely.
But Nancy only looked at her now, as though she couldn't believe what Cassie was saying. “You still don't get it, Cass, do you?”
“Get what?” Cassie felt like a fool, but she had too many other things on her mind to want to play guessing games with Nancy.
“He's not what you ever thought of him. Very few people know him as he is.” Cassie stiffened at the oblique mention of Desmond. She wasn't about to get lured into discussing him with Nancy. As far as anyone knew, he was still her husband.
“I don't know what you mean,” Cassie said coolly, looking the other woman over. And suddenly she realized that there was a great deal more here than she'd ever seen. There was anger, and jealousy, and envy. Was Nancy in love with him? Had she been jealous of Cassie? Cassie suddenly realized how naive she'd been, about all of them. It seemed as though none of them had been what they'd pretended.
“I don't think we should be talking about Desmond,” Cassie said quietly. “Unless you'd like to discuss it with him directly.”
‘That's a possibility,” Nancy said with a supercilious smile. “I knew he wouldn't stay with you for long. It was all for show. Too bad you never figured that out, Cass.” But what did she know about all of it? What had Desmond told her?
Cassie blushed as she shrugged a shoulder. “It's a little complicated for me, I guess. Where I come from, people usually get married for other reasons.”
“I'm sure he was taken with you. And you might even have hung onto him if you'd played your cards right. But he doesn't like to play with kids. More than anything, Cass, I think you bored him.” And then, as Cassie looked at her, she understood what she was saying. She understood all of it, and how vicious they had been to her, how rotten.
“And you don't, Nancy? Is that it?”
“It would appear not. But then again, I'm a little more mature. I play the game better than you do.”
“And what game is that?” Cassie wanted to know now.
“It's a game of doing exactly what he wants, when he wants it, and exactly the way he wants it.” To Cassie it sounded like a service business and not a marriage.
“Is that your contract with him? Is that how you got your house, and the college education for Janie? I always thought he was so generous. But I guess maybe there's more to it than meets the eye.” This was exactly what Nick had meant. Desmond Williams had mistresses, whom he paid handsomely to be on call for him, and do whatever he wanted. For Nancy, it had meant chaperoning Cassie around. And suddenly Cassie realized how much it must have irked her. In a way, if it hadn't been so disgusting, it might almost have been funny.
“Desmond is very generous with me. But I don't have any illusions about him,” Nancy said coldly, looking right at Cassie. “He's never going to many me. He's never going to get involved with me in public. But he knows I'm here for him. And he's good to me. It works out very well for both of us.” But suddenly, listening to the cold simplicity of it, the calculated emptiness that allegedly met his needs, Cassie wanted to reach out and slap her:
“Was he with you when he was married to me?” Cassie asked in a strangled voice, terrified by the conversation.
“Obviously. Where do you think he went at night when he wasn't working? And why do you think he wasn't sleeping with you? I told you, Cassie, he doesn't like playing games with children. And he's not as evil as you think. He didn't think there was any point sleeping with you, or misleading you more than he had to. Everything was for the tour. In some ways, Desmond is a purist.”
‘The bastard.” The words escaped Cassie without any thought on her part. But as she looked at Nancy, she suddenly hated her. And him. It had all been a game. For both of them. It was all part of the Pacific tour, and the grander scheme of things, all to sell airplanes.
Marrying her had been just one small part of the plan, for publicity, and all the while he'd been sleeping with Nancy. No wonder Nancy had been so cool to her once they married. And maybe, for a little while, Nancy had even been worried. She was ten years older than Cassie, and not nearly as exciting, or as pretty.
“Weren't you just a little bit afraid he might fall for me?” Cassie eyed her carefully, and was pleased to see the older woman squirm at the question.
“Not really. We talked about it. You're really not his type, Cass.”
“Actually, given everything I know, I'd say that's a compliment.” Cassie looked at her coolly. And then she decided to deliver a small blow to the opponent. “You're not alone, you know. You're not the only one with an arrangement with Desmond.” She said it very confidently, and it was easy to see that she had made Nancy more than a little nervous. Her livelihood and her future depended on her “arrangement” with Desmond.
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