Molly Ryan - A Real Disaster

My smile was watery and even without looking in the mirror I knew that my eyes were red and puffy.

“What’s up?”

“I could ask you the same thing,” Turner said. “You okay?”

“I’m fine,” I lied.

The last thing he needed to know is that I was upset about Nash. I didn’t want to feel that way. It's hard to get rid of feelings. Sometimes when you try it only makes it harder.

“You don’t look fine. Your face is red and splotchy and your eyes are puffy.”

“Oh that?” I said, feigning nonchalance. “I have horrible fall allergies. They kick my ass every year.”

I looked at his hand. His knuckles were still bruised and scabbed.

“How’s the hand?”

“Better than that bastard’s face. Did you see him? He still has the shiner.”

Turner had a smile on his face. Up until now I would have probably scolded him, telling him that he was being an ass. But not now. Maybe Turner was right; maybe Nash had gotten what he deserved.

“It still hurts, though. I can’t really bend it too much without it hurting.”

“Did you break anything?” I asked as I inspected his hand.

“I don’t think so. I went to the infirmary and she looked at it. She said that it didn’t seem broken especially since I could, essentially bend it. She thinks it’s just a horrible bruise. If it doesn’t stop hurting she said that I should go to the hospital.”

“Well, have you gone to the hospital?” Turner shook his head.

“No, not yet. It hurts but the pain is going away. I’m sure that by this time next week it won’t hurt at all.”

“If you say so,” I said, not really believing him. “Be careful though. You can’t just go around fighting with people because sooner or later someone will fight back.”

“I know, I know. I usually keep my head up and out of trouble but I couldn’t stop myself when he said that shit. It’s not going to happen again though.”

“It better not,” I teased. “Because if it does, I’m going to kick your ass myself.”

Turner scoffed and rolled his eyes.

“Like you could kick my ass. You’re a puny little thing!”

“Yeah but I can pinch like the devil,” I warned and brought my hands up into a pinching motion. “Do you really want to risk it?”

“Yeah,” Turner said and stuck out his arm. “I doubt you can hurt me. I have muscle upon muscle.”

“You asked for it,” I said and clamped his flesh between my fingers.

I pinched as hard as I could, rotating my hand as I did. Turner’s face became red and he pulled his arm away.

“Damn!” he cried out. “What the hell was that?!”

“A pinch,” I said.

“That was no damn pinch. You’re vicious.”

“I tried to warn you. You didn’t want to believe me.”

Turner rubbed his arm with his free hand and shifted away from me.

“You are dangerous,” he muttered. “I don’t know if I want to be around you anymore.”

“Oh stop being a pansy,” I chided.

I raised my eyebrows and then smiled at him. The two of us burst into laughter and I clutched at my stomach. After the argument I had with Nash, laughing for no good reason was exactly what I needed.

My laugh petered out and I stared at Turner. He was looking around, taking in the amazing weather. His hair seemed darker against the sun and the sun hit his eyes, letting the color shine through. He was cute, handsome even. His smile lit up everything around me. I knew that I could sit with him for hours on end and do nothing but laugh and talk.

So why hadn’t I given him another chance? Why had I been avoiding him? Why had I been so worried about Nash and not Turner? Turner is so easy going. There’s no strings; no expectations. Why didn’t I see that before?

“What are you staring at?” Turner asked.

“Nothing,” I said and became flustered.

“That doesn’t look like a nothing look,” Turner accused. “You were staring at me like… Well I don’t know like what. But you were staring! I saw you were staring!”

Turner’s eyes got wide and he put his hand to his mouth.

“Oh my God, are you going to start stalking me? Am I going to have to get a restraining order? Oh God I don’t feel safe!”

Suddenly Turner whipped around.

“Help! Help! This girl is giving me the eye! I need an adult! I need an adult!”

“Shut up!” I exclaimed through my giggles.

People looked over and shook their heads at us.

“You are such a loser!”

“Yeah but you love it, don’t lie.”

He grinned.

“Let’s go out on a date,” I heard him say.

“Um…”

“A date,” he repeated. “Let’s go out on a re-do first date. I want another chance. I want a Mulligan.”

“I guess,” I said.

With Nash out of the picture it was worth a shot.

“Only if you want to Lily...”

“Of course I do. How about tomorrow night? Around six?”

The butterflies in my stomach started to swirl around at full force.

“Yeah, that sounds great. And I promise, there won’t be any drinking involved.”

I grinned.

“Are you sure that this is a good idea?” Sabrina asked me as I told her about my impending date with Turner. “Don’t you want to be with Nash?”

After seeing that girl kiss Nash it didn’t matter if I wanted to be with him.

“I thought I did. But he has a bunch of other girls occupying his time so there's no reason to waste my own.”

“So that's why you're going with Turner?”

“I guess. I kind of like him also. He's nice and he doesn't have a bunch of girls wanting him. There is no one to compete with.”

“Yeah.”

I looked through my closet, surveying each outfit before moving on. I had to pick an outfit that was cute. I wanted to look like myself and not overdo it.

“Does Turner even know about you and Nash?”

I shook my head.

“Of course he doesn’t. But all Nash and I did was walk to my dorm together and then hang out at his place after Turner punched him,” I told her. “I doubt Nash would tell him. They don’t talk, remember?”

Sabrina rolled her eyes as looked at her notes for class.

“I just think that if you were going to go out with him you should have told him about you and Nash.”

I turned to her.

“Why? It’s not like we had sex.”

“Because if he finds out from someone else he will never forgive you. You will have a black mark next to your name forever.”

I paused, considering Sabrina’s point. Should I have told Turner? He knew we sat next to each other in class. But I did stay the night at his place and he did try to kiss me. He would instantly assume the worse since it’s Nash.

“Wel,l it’s too late to be worrying about that now,” I said as I pulled out a pair of jeans and a sweater. “I’m not going to tell him tonight on our date.”

“In my experience,” Sabrina said. “Things like this don’t stay hidden for long.”

I shrugged even though I was frowning.

“Maybe I’ll tell him later next week when I have time to think about what I’ll say.”

Sabrina shrugged but I could tell that she didn’t approve of the way I was handling things. I was hoping that I would never have to tell him in general. I didn’t want to see his pain, his anger, or any other emotion he would show. I didn’t want to disappoint him and I definitely didn’t want to lose his friendship.

Turner would find out one day. I just hoped that it would be long enough away that he wouldn’t stay too angry at me.

After slipping on the clothes, I dabbed some eyeliner and lip gloss onto my face and brushed my hair until it shone. Throwing converses on my feet I smoothed my sweater down and then grabbed my watch. I was throwing the last few things in my bag when there was a knock on the door.

My heart hammered and I felt a bit woozy. Pasting on a smile, I maneuvered my way across the room and opened the door. Turner stood there, a smile on his face, and a single red rose in his hand.

“I was going to buy you a dozen,” he told me as he handed me the rose. “But that didn’t seem special. I thought one single rose made a better statement. Do you like it?”

 “Yes… Thank you.”

Putting the rose in a bottle of water, I waved goodbye to Sabrina and left my room. Turner and I walked down the stairs in silence. He rocked back and forth on his feet, whistling.

“Are you nervous or something?”

“Is it that obvious?” Turner asked. “I want to make this date good, great even. I’m trying to make up for the last time.”

“You don’t have to make up for anything. We both had a hand in ruining that date. So why not pretend it never happened?”

“Yeah… You look cute, Lily.”

“Thanks Turner.”

“Is something wrong?” Turner asked, looking worried.

“No,” I said quickly, too quickly. “Nothing’s wrong. Everything’s perfect.”

“Good,” Turner said, satisfied with my answer.

Turner led me to his car and opened the door for me. I glanced in the back seat to see a picnic basket and a blanket resting there. Turner grinned.

“I thought that a picnic would be perfect tonight. It’s not too hot, not too cold. I know this spot that is a little secluded.”

I cocked an eyebrow and looked at him.

“Not that I think we need to be secluded. That’s not what this is about. I’m not trying to get into your pants or anything.”

This was going to the wrong place.

“That’s good to know,” I laughed.

He laughed too.

He started the car, revving the engine, and put down the window. Pulling away from the curb, the two of us drove in silence. I looked out the window and watched the scenery whiz by. The colors of the trees blended together until it was one big blob.

“So, ah, I hope you don’t mind too much but I packed some Italian food. I’m always a sucker for Italian.”

“Sound great. I love Italian food actually. It’s one of my favorites.”

Turner sighed in relief.

“That’s great. We’re almost there.”

Turner drove for a bit more, changing lanes. Finally he pulled into the parking lot and threw the car into park.

“We’re here.”

I exited the car. Turner grabbed the basket in the back seat and then followed me.

He grabbed my hand and to my surprise kissed me. We didn’t stop holding hands as we climbed the hill. When we finally reached the top, Turner smoothed down a blanket and I looked out into the horizon, watching the sun set. It was gorgeous.

“This view is amazing!” I breathed.

“Isn’t it?”

He appeared behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist.

“I was hoping that we would get here on time to see this.”

In the distance I could hear kids screaming and playing. There was music playing somewhere but I couldn’t pull my eyes away from the sun to even look around.

“Turner it’s gorgeous.”

“No, you’re gorgeous. The sun doesn’t hold a candle to you.”

My heart swelled.

* * *

“So when I was in high school I was the epidemy of a good girl. I wore pleated skirts and knee high socks with loafers.”

“That sounds sexy,” Turner said and I laughed.

“Trust me, I was anything but sexy,” I told him. “I wore ire rimmed glasses and my hair was always tied in braids down my back. I didn’t wear any make up and I always had my nose in a book.”

“Why is that so bad?”

“Because I was lame. People made fun of me, talked about me behind my back. I was the odd one out.”

“Or you were unique,” he countered. “I think that if I saw you in high school I would have gone out of my way to get to know you.”

“Well then you would have been the only one.”

“That’s because I have a thing for nerdy girls who read too much.”

“How about good girls that go to church every week and doesn’t do anything fun?”

“Even better,” he said with a wicket grin.

I rolled my eyes and pushed Turner. He lost his balance and toppled to the ground. He winced as his elbow met with a tree root.

“Goddammit!” Turner cursed as he rubbed his elbow. “Damn that hurt!”

“Oh God, are you okay?”

I lost my smile and watched Turner rock back and forth, cradling his arm.

“I’m sorry, Turner. I didn’t mean for you to hit your elbow.”

Turner rubbed his elbow roughly and then looked up at me.

“Oh well, it’s not any worse than getting hit in the head with a basketball. I’ll survive.”