I heard Annie’s audible intake of breath. “Oh my God, Gage. That is horrible.”

“I was so fuckin’ pissed in the beginning. Then Cobie made me realize there was nothing I could do. I had to accept it. It still hurts and I still struggle. I still have my moments of anger, but I know Cobie is with us.”

Annie took a drink of her beer. “I wish I could be a little more like you.” She gave a sad smile over her bottle.

“Really? Why’s that?” I figured I was the last person she wanted to be like.

“I’ve never talked about this before.” Her eyes started tearing up again.

“You don’t have to. I told you what I did so you would know where I was coming from. I like you, but I’m not looking for anything serious. I just want to have fun again.”

“I was almost six months pregnant when Gabe’s dad was killed.” Annie stared off into empty space.

“Wait, what?”

Shaking her head, Annie looked at me. “Huh?”

“I don’t want to dig, but I thought that Tristan guy was Gabe’s dad.”

The disgust that took over Annie’s face let me know how wrong I was before she opened her mouth. “Fuck no! I hate him. He is the reason Gabe doesn’t have a father.” Shutting her eyes she took a deep breath. “Jase and Tristan have a band with a couple other guys. Gabe’s dad, Derek, was in the band. They had a show one night at some bar about an hour away.” I saw a tear fall from her eye. Reaching up I used my thumb and brushed it away. Flinching, Annie opened her eyes. “After the show the guys thought it would be smart to get high before driving home. Derek knew he was going to be a father. Hell, we said once I turned eighteen we would get married. That never happened. Tristan wrecked his Mustang, killing Derek instantly. Leaving me alone, seventeen and pregnant, to raise our son.”

And here I thought what I went through was bad. At least I had the gift of time. Time to spend with Cobie and make memories I would never forget. To cherish her and our family. At the time I thought I was going through hell. In reality, I was married to someone I loved, we had a beautiful healthy baby, my career was great, and I was surrounded by the ones I loved. Annie lost everything without warning.

“What about your parents? Didn’t they help you?”

Annie shook her head once. “No idea who my father is. Last I heard Vicky, or my mom, if that’s what you want to call her was in jail for drugs. I haven’t talked to her since I was fifteen.” Laying her head back on the arm rest, she used her empty hand to rub her eyes. “I have a sister, Heather, two years younger than I am. When we were little we bounced from foster home to foster home. We were separated and since she was only six at the time a family eventually adopted her. I ended up with a foster family that lived next to my best friend. They never adopted me, but I stayed there until I found out I was pregnant.”

I was at a loss for words. I wanted to tell her how sorry I was or how I could only imagine how she felt. I knew they were just words. They did nothing to ease the pain. The ache was still there. People could talk until they were blue in the face and had a raw throat, nothing helped. This was something you had to deal with on your own.

Leaning up I saw her eyes were shut. Her lips were slightly spread open. I wanted to kiss her. Before thinking myself out of it, I leaned over her and pressed my lips against hers. Her eyes flashed opened. Just as I thought she was going to push me away she dropped her beer on the floor and let her legs straighten. Running my tongue across her bottom lip, I gently sucked it into my mouth and nipped it before taking over her mouth. She tasted like a mix of beer and mint.

Letting my body weight press her into the couch I shoved my hands into her hair. The little moans that were escaping her were pushing me closer and closer to doing something I was sure neither of us were ready for. I wanted her. Bad. The fact was, I wasn’t sure if I was ready to want her. Mentally I was telling myself to stop. My cock on the other hand was up and ready to show off.

Breaking the kiss, I lifted my head. “Annie, if you don’t want this to go any further then we need to stop. I’m starting to lose my control.”

Slowly opening her eyes, Annie was breathing heavy. “What if I said I wanted you to lose your control?” She ran her teeth over her top lip. Fuck. That was hot as hell.

“Are you sure? I mean, are you ready?” Am I ready?

She wrapped her arms around my neck. “Yes. Please. I want this.”

I didn’t want to disappoint her. “Not out here. I don’t want to wake Gabe up.”

Annie smirked. “A little sure of yourself are you?”

Raising an eyebrow, I quipped, “Yep.” I stood and lifted her into my arms.

Making the short walk to my room I laid her on my giant bed. She looked nervous. Maybe she wasn’t as ready as she thought. Or, maybe it was me that was nervous. “Annie, we don’t have to do anything you’re not ready for.”…or anything that I’m not sure I’m ready for.

“I’m not going to say no, Gage. I have wanted you since the night in your bar. I was afraid. I don’t want to get attached and get hurt again.”

Lying beside her, I reached for her hand. “I’m not making promises, Annie. I’m not ready for promises and futures. I like you, right now. That’s all I can offer.”

Turning her head to face me, she said, “I learned six years ago that you have to live in the moment. I have been too scared until you. Something about you makes me want to live.”

Digging into my pocket, I adjusted myself and pulled my iPod out. I hit shuffle and tossed it on the nightstand. Scooting back to Annie I slid my hand under the hem of her shorts. I felt her stop breathing. “You gotta breathe, baby. You won’t be much fun if you pass out from lack of oxygen.”

Annie had a nervous smile and tried to laugh. “Sorry. It’s just been awhile.”

“I know what you mean.”

Scrunching her face, she said, “No, I don’t think you do.”

Popping the button on her shorts and pulling the zipper down, I slipped my hand under her light pink lace thong. I felt her smooth, silky skin. “What do you mean?”

Annie’s cheeks heated. “Have you had sex within the last six years?”

I gave her a look that said “duh” and nodded my head. “Oh. Oh! You haven’t fucked anyone since Derek?” I asked incredulously.

She shut her eyes and bit down on her bottom lip. “No.”

Keeping my hand in her panties but not moving, I demanded, “Look at me.”

Peeking at me she mumbled, “Let me guess, I can go now?”

Smiling at how adorable she looked, I shook my head. “No. I want you right here. But, why me?”

Annie fully opened her eyes. “I told you. You make me want to live. I don’t know why, but I feel safe with you. I feel alive. When you’re around I don’t hurt so much. Like you said, though, I’m not ready for anything special. I just want to find myself again and live. Have fun.”

“I am happy to help.” I flashed her a grin and brought my mouth to hers. I’m not sure if I’m doing the right thing but for right now I’m turning my brain off. I liked the way Annie made me feel.

Slipping my hand the rest of the way into her panties I felt just how alive I made her. Which also made my shorts that much tighter. “Yeah, I would say you’re alive. Damn, baby.”

Annie pulled my head back to her. She took control of the kiss, moving her mouth with reason, purpose. I felt her hand sliding down my side and into the waistband of my shorts and boxers. My body jerked when her warm hand grabbed my dick. Her touch singeing me.

She broke the kiss, her eyes where huge. “What’s wrong?”

Pulling both her lips between her teeth, she glanced between us. “Um. I d-don’t think…I don’t think this will work.”

Trying not to let my frustration show, I pushed myself up onto my arms. “Just a few minutes ago you were all for it.”

She shook her head and palmed my erection. “This. I don’t think it will work. Like, fit. Inside me. You know what I mean?”

Not that I look at other guys junk or compare sizes, but I was happy with what I had. There had never been any complaints. Just hearing Annie’s true concern had my cock twitching. Fighting my laughter, I said, “It will fit. Trust me.”

Letting out a sigh, she slowly nodded in agreement. Standing, I pulled her shorts and thong off. I let them fall to the floor before taking my shorts and boxers off, dropping them next to her discarded clothes. Pulling my shirt over my head I stopped when I saw her mouth wide open, one eyebrow arched. “What?” I asked, dropping my shirt.

She snapped her mouth shut and swallowed. “I’ve just um…I’ve never seen so many muscles on one person. Not that I really check out a lot of guys but to go from nothing to”- she motioned up and down my body- “that. Shit!”

Grinning, I crawled over her until we were face to face. “And I plan to use every one of these muscles.” Not waiting for her reply I kissed her hard. Using my tongue to explore her mouth. Using my legs I pushed hers open. With one hand I rubbed over her swollen bud. She raised herself up and released my mouth just long enough to pull her shirt, which just so happened to be my jersey, over her head. Crashing my lips back to hers I quickly unsnapped her bra and with my free hand and tossed it the floor.

Running kisses down her neck, I stopped to inhale her soft vanilla scent. Continuing down her neck I made my way to her taut, pink nipple. I sucked it into my mouth and lightly nibbled on it. She let out a soft moan and shoved her hands into my hair. Using her fingers she massaged my scalp as I used my fingers to massage her warm, wet pussy.

I pulled my hand away from her. I grabbed my throbbing cock and placed it at her opening. Slowly, I started pushing into her slick heat. She squeezed her eyes shut and bit down on her bottom lip, hard.

“Too much?”

She shook her head. Pulling in a deep breath, she said, “No. Oh God. Don’t stop.”

“Hurt.” I meant it as a question but it was more of a statement.

“No. More uncomfortable. I’ll be okay.”

I slid to the hilt. Not moving I kissed the tip of her nose. “I’m going to move.” I started pulling out when she was grabbing the sheets around us, her body arching off the bed.

“Oh my God! Holy fuck!” She yanked the pillow from beside her head and covered her face. Drowning out her cries.

That didn’t take long. I guess that old saying is true. No pain, no gain. I pulled the pillow from her face. Her cheeks were flushed. Her pupils dilated. Her breathing heavy. “Why did you cover your face?”

“Gabe. I didn’t want to wake him. I don’t know how well he would take to walking in here seeing his mommy impaled by your unhumanly large penis.”

Laughing, I said, “He’s at the opposite side of the suite. No way will he hear you. I want to see your face when you get off.”

“Next time?” She coughed out.

“Yep. This isn’t a one night thing, Annie. Obviously we don’t want anything serious, but that doesn’t mean we can’t be special friends.”

“You want me to be your fuck buddy?”

Lifting my eyebrows I searched her face. “For lack of better words, yeah, you could call it that.”

She shifted under me, my cock sliding back into her. Her breath caught. “Deal.”

Gorilla by Bruno Mars filled the room. How apt. Not letting my dick fully slide into her, I pulled out and quickly slammed into her. I repeated the process a few more times before Annie’s eyes grew dark, her breathing labored. And that’s how I found out she was mutli orgasmic. Seeing her face twist with pleasure and hearing her saying my name had me losing it. My body went jagged, jerking at its own accord.

I rolled to my side and let out a wary breath. Pulling the blanket over our naked bodies, I stared at the ceiling. “I have a question.”

Annie lifted herself, resting her head on her hand. “What?”

“What does your tattoo mean?” I ran my hand along her lower hip and back where the ink was.

“She flies with her own wings. I got it when I was sixteen. One of Derek’s friends that was in the band with him is a tattoo artist. Not that I was a stoner like the other guys, but one night we were all smoking and Kamp decided he was going to give me a tattoo. I found the quote and Kamp permanently put it on my skin. Little did I know just how much meaning those three words were going to hold.”

What does a person say to that response? She had been through so much. Something inside me wanted to protect her and keep her safe. I wanted to find her mom and shake the shit outta her. Who could ever leave their children, choosing drugs over them? I didn’t want Annie to experience any more hurt. Too bad I knew that’s exactly what I would do. I would hurt her. I should walk away. But, I couldn’t. I wouldn’t.